I have lived a life with thankfully few stumbling blocks.
When I was born I received proper medical care, as did my mother. I enrolled in public school which, while laden with sticky-fingered boys and manicured girls, offered me a safe haven. When in relationships I have the choice of tying the knot with my boyfriend or opting for the only ring around my finger the one mailed to me from school. I can have kids if I like. A room full of toddling children seems a bit intimidating, and my family would not be disappointed in me or punish me for deciding to have no children.
A woman I know was offered the same things. She, like many of us, accepted them without thinking. She went to a four-year college and got her bachelor's. Entering into a job was not difficult. Intelligence and credentials paved the application process with silky stones for her to glide along. Gender discrimination thankfully did not play a role in her life. But discrimination on basis of perceived sexuality did.
My shoulder was wet when she told me. The words spilled out, each more unbelievable than the last. Charged with discrimination based on sexual orientation. A woman at her office she barely saw or talked to had accused her. Stated that she felt threatened by her lesbian advances; she was straight and my friend needed to back off.
My friend was heterosexual. She was informed of her rights, or lack thereof, as the accused person. The woman had mental evidence of all the encounters leading to her accusations. My friend did not. The victim in the matter was not the woman at her office. It was her. It was painful having to sit through her tirades and tearful confessions, knowing that she was falsely accused and had few ways of defending herself.
She never had to go to court. The charges were dropped after the woman at work realized the person she targeted was not homosexual and had not committed a crime.
Before the incident had happened, I had no encounters with discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. I was brought up seeing love as love, unflinchingly supporting the LGBT community. I had heard stories, tales, of people beaten because of who they were. I read articles, facts, about people denied jobs and marriage because of the way they loved. But I did not understand what was happening until I saw her tear-stained cheeks and lips, bruised from pressing them together in frustration. And I knew this could not continue. Discrimination on the basis of sexuality cannot continue. It happens to many people a year. Some cannot defend themselves against the barrage of slurs and crude jokes in the workplace and as a result choose to leave. Some cannot even make it into the workplace because their boss discovered that they were of a different "type."
At times it seems as if we have much ammunition but no weapons to shoot from. The LGBT community has made great strides towards equality, as have women. Yes, as of 1973 homosexuality was no longer considered a mental disorder by the APA. But when I look around me at school I see people mocking homosexuals, I hear people using angry slurs directed at friends, and I know that if it makes me uncomfortable, it would make some of my dearest friends even more so. So should I keep my feelings about this discrimination under wraps? Should you? No. Even doing something so small as removing hurtful words like "fag" from your vocabulary and encouraging your friends to do otherwise can make a difference. Don't be afraid to air your beliefs, and don't hesitate to call someone out when they are discriminating against someone because of that person's orientation. Together we can all trudge forward into a more equal society. We doesn't mean homosexuals only. We doesn't mean the Bible bashers. We doesn't mean the Democrats, and we doesn't mean the Republicans.
We means us, the people.
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