The line has officially been blurred. Thats it, someone has taken the last uniquely fun thing about being a man away from my Y chromosomal brethren. Go and look at this before you continue with my blog, or else the rest will probably not make any sense. Here it is:
http://www.mysweetpee.com/index.asp
No more can we men mock our feminine counterparts with the age old arguement ender: "Well at least I can pee standing up."
Never again will we be the only gender that can write our name in the snow; your girlfriend can too, and it won't require gymnastics and yoga.
Now they are armed with "My SweetPee", and times they are a-changin', my sons.
With such wonderfully vivid and heartfelt testimonials how can they not sell a billion units? Testimonials like this one:
"One day last year, I was on a shopping trip with my wonderful Aunt Susan. We had to make a "pit stop" in the mall, and as soon as I walked in to the restroom, I gasped in disgust and found only one stall that wasn't clogged. I was ready to close the door when my aunt handed me a disposable My SweetPee. After telling me what to do, I used the device and I was so grateful!!!!"
They even have handy usage guides, reminiscent of those you find in an airplane that show you how to put on an oxygen mask, without strangling yourself. For your convenience they even have little pictures showing you both methods of usage. Mind you - one picture looked like a particulalry saggy condom, and the other could alternately be used to show a drag queen the "tuck" method in case she has decided to wear a miniskirt for her performance.
Invented by twin sisters in Houston, the site tells you. It goes on to say how extensive research and development was done in order to secure a patent. Finally, another way to use all those plastic walmart shopping bags! Way to go "green" gals! Or, uh yellow, as the case may be.
Really? Are your restrooms that obnoxious ladies? I know a men's restroom, is usually a hive of bacteriological and viral nastyness, only fit for scrawny men in rubber suits emblazoned with CDC logos. I know that generally guys have a bit of trouble with aiming when it's not their own toilet. I just always thought that a woman's restroom was bound to be more clean. I also thought that a lady's restroom had plush carpeting, an overabundance of pot-pouri, and also doubled as a secret meeting place for the Feminist Agenda. Guess I was wrong.
Supposedly My SweetPee is such the height of convenience it will fit in your purse. I've seen some purses that reminded me of a highschool senior's backpack. Overloaded to the point that I know some soldiers that would pale at the thought of hoisting a purse up a two mile hill. Hell, I've even seen some purses that could house a small family of pygmys during a heavy monsoon. Do you need one more sanitary device? It might end up breaking a back , then you'd have to find an injury incubus to sue someone. (Thanks Perish ;o) - see: http://www.progressiveu.org/184300-lawyers).
What the fuck do I know. I'd really like to hear from some of my female buddies to find out if this is a worthy product. It must be for some women, just look at what they have to say about it's ease of use on the FAQ:
"Whether standing toward or away from the commode, point the wider side in the direction of the toilet bowl. Shape My SweetPee sides like a funnel with your hands. Then just point and shoot."
Fanaile asked me if that was the way boys are potty trained, I said yes. Now we're all equal. Who knew that equality would come in the name of "Sweet Pee"?
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