I love how inconsequential my daily decisions are. The thought of waking up and knowing that even if I make a mistake, everything is going to be alright, well, that's a nice thought.
Not that I'm a pessimist, by any means, because I think people really can make a difference in the lives of others. Can one person change the world? They can for sure.
But I guess this all comes down to how you view the grand scheme of things; destiny, the will of God, or random chance?
I see first two as the same thing; the only difference I think is that people who believe in destiny take out that whole 'greater being' element. Anyhow, my youth group did a bunch of segments where we talked about the will of God, and since then as I've thought about it and done some digging, I think I've come to a much better understanding of it.
Ann, one of the adults in my group, talked about the will of God being like a park. Now, I hate trying to simplify these things into little real-life examples. Like, when people talk about the trinity being like an egg, it ticks me off, which is a story for another day. But this illustration actually helped me and made sense. It's as if God has this ultimate goal for us, but on the way to that goal, we have to make decisions as far as how to get there. So it's as if he wants you to stay in the park, but it's up to you if you're on the merry-go-round or the swings. It's not that 'he doesn't care', it's that he created us with free will on purpose. And so, as long as you are ultimately following the guidelines he has set out for you, you are following the will of God.
It's like this whole 'soul-mate' business. I love that scene in Ever After where the prince is talking to Da Vinci about whether people have one person destined for them or several. I tend to believe there are many people in the world that God would 'approve of' for each of us as partners. But it's up to us, and I suppose somewhat our preferences, to determine who is the best choice.
And so, as always, it brings me back to this whole college decision making process. I think North Park is the ideal choice for me, but if it doesn't work financially then it's quite obvious that's not the will of God I think, since God wants us to be stewards of what he gives to us and that whole bit. But what about the other schools? I don't have a strong preference really, so what does that mean? Well, my guidance counselor, who I trust more than most other people in my life because of his spiritual guidance and help in determining my best course through high school, told me blatantly he thinks I should not attend a rural school. He doesn't normally make flat-out 'you should' or 'you shouldn't' statements, so I tend to take him very seriously when he does. But that still leaves with at least 4 very realistic possibilities. And honestly, I don't think any of them are against the will of God.
Sure, going to a different state will change the people I meet, which changes my potential impact on them and theirs on me. But I honestly believe that if God needs me somewhere, I'll know, and so, while these decisions aren't something I should just blow off, it's not my place to stress over them.
So that's what I've been thinking about. It's a little world with big potential.
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