A Beginner's Guide to Love

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Disclaimer:

Here I am talking about true love, not corporate "film, food, and flowers" love. Not "constant sex love", not "overly-possessive" love. A connection more emotional than physical. If ye be so minded: more spiritual than secular. Love is when all people can break down, without sacrificing their "pride". This isn't a complete extolling of love, but that would take way too long. This is a refutation of a lie we are told as teens, and an explanation of where to start after we learn the truth. A primer. A guide. A beginning.

A final caveat: love strips us of all of our roles. After we find it, we rediscover ourselves and the world around us, every day)

Thus, with a warning, we start anew, challenging our beliefs in the search for truth.

Myth: Love as a teen is impossible.
Fact: Wrong. Completely wrong. Of course it's possible! It's just very hard to do, because of who we think we must be. Because of who we are told we must be, because of how we are told we should act, because of how we think we should act.
More fact: It's even harder to do when we believe love can be represented with chocolate and roses, gifts and more gifts.

For those of you trapped in this false representation of the ultimate sacrifice/gain:

Realize this:
No one will love you no matter how many roses you give them if that's all
you do.

Realize this:
Saying "I love you" means nothing.
Acting "I love you" means something.
Feeling "I love you" means everything.

Realize this:
You don't find love, love finds you. And you generally don't realize it until you've lost it again.

Realize this:
Once you've lost it, nothing matters. Food loses its flavor, color its depth, and life its uniqueness. Love is a drug, more addictive than any other.

Love is the ultimate sacrifice; you are putting yourself completely to the hands of another person. But Love is also the ultimate gain, because someone is trusting you enough to put all of them in your hands.

Trust, Honesty, Truth. Three tenets, three supports, three pillars of love. Just two won't suffice.

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