Six years ago today, I became a mommy for the first time. Four weeks ahead of schedule, this little 6lb 10oz girl, changed my life forever. I remember standing there on the other side of the glass wall in the NICU, thinking how beautiful she was, and amazed that I did something, so perfect. Wondering how I could be so in love with someone I had only known an hour. I guess love at first sight does exist, it's just not what you initially think of.
Perfect in every sense of the word. Beautiful. Red hair, big blue eyes, and even through the iv, feeding tube, and oxygen, she seemed to be already smiling like she knew that she was the center of the universe. And that she was going to make every difference in the world. Mine.
She was from birth, looked at as "different" or "special" but not "perfect" by any means by others. Four weeks early, cord around the neck and swallowed amniotic fluid, born with an extra unformed "finger" almost as small as a skin tag. But all I saw was perfection. Even now in her life, with Autism being our battle of every day. She's made fun of for being different, or disabled. You ask me about my daughter, and I'll tell you -- she's perfect.
The perfect moment. A split second changes you -- who you used to be, didn't matter anymore. Your overcome with emotion, your heart stops beating, everything around you is in slow motion, all waiting to hear that first perfect cry. And believe me, nothing is longer than the few seconds that sometimes takes.
Like other young women, mothers have dreams, hopes, and goals they're working towards. And even the most determined woman who becomes a mother.. All you can think is "if all I do in my life is be your mom, it'll be enough."
My kids are what God put me on this Earth to do. Because I'll never do anything else in my life that compares. Ally changes the lives of most that she meets. She just makes you want to be a better person. She never gives up, and works full time hours, just to learn the basics... She's not Autistic, she's not damaged, she's not disabled or scarred. She's just.......... perfect.
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