benjareen's blog

so you're walking...they say 'slow down'...what do you do? they say 'speed up.' and you step on the gas. give you the bums rush. run ur back bumper. 'do as u're told' they say. 'and no one gets hurt.' do as u're commanded. and show some respect. authority says 'stay'. they say "go". u're walking on 2 ft. and walking alone. other defenses wouldnt stand up against this sinister matter. over all the waves of high voltage. and cancer that eats the ground. others say 'you move too slow.' and some they move too fast. some say, 'listen for the sounds of nature'. others merely laugh. you tree hugger. you hippie. you business prop. you yuppie. shouldnt it be the same? and an answer of tuff lovin is in place. (are u in place?) authority says 'stay'. another guard says 'go'. you're walking on 2 feet. and now u're on your own. authority tells you "stay". but then they tell you "go". you're walking on your feet. now you're walking on your own. - BPJ (benjareen)

tomorrow i head for israel for 15 days. while i am away, the scholarship deadline will pass. so before it is too late...allow me to say good luck and congradulations to whoever the award winner is.

and whenever the winner is named - if the name is posted on this site - perhaps we should try something...
let's try actually congradulating her or him on the winning of the award, rather than bashing them and tearing them down for writing what we (you) might think of as pretentious. Which has seemed to be a rather frequent occurance on this blog site. whether or not your argument is correct, no one likes a sore loser. *and with that in mind, no one likes a sore winner either...*

what's the point in doing this blog thing anyway?
all anyone seems to care about is winning.
who cares. if money is your only prerogative then go away.
you'll just become obsessed.
and forget what you're really on earth for...

but maybe i'm the only one who cares...
maybe none of this matters.
maybe i should quit...
and just stop trying...

*i cant wait to see what cynical comments people leave this time*

it starts with a shadow. and moves to a friend.
where a tongue ring smiles. and a festival begins.
you look adoringly, thru untrained eyes.
and watch as you collapse. and break down. and cry.
the time on the clock reads "blurry"

from the time we were kids. til the time we reached our 20's.

these are the faces that provide good will.
with laughs. and tears. and hugs that bind.
these are what lead us to the light in the middle.
the friends that take care of you.

These are the people that make your life better.

Last night something pretty bad happened.
We lost a friend.
All shocked and broken.
Shut down, exploded.

"Jeddy 3" is what we first called him.
Then it was Jed.
Though Jed's system's dead.
Therefore, so's Jed.

We assembled him in the Kitchen.
Made out of this and...
Made out of that and...
Whatever was at hand.

When we finished Jed we were so proud.
We celebrated.
Congratulated.
For what we'd created.

Jed could run and walk, sing and talk and...
Compile thoughts and...
Solve lots of problems.
We learned so much from him.

A couple years went by and something happened.
we gave jed less attention.
We had new inventions.
We left for conventions.

Jed had found our booze and drank every drop.
He fizzled and popped.
He rattled and rocked.
Finally he just stopped. - Grandaddy

Something I Wrote While Sitting In Class

Born into fortune.
Capitalistic went the curse.
To adjust on your          wrath
Take a pitcher of beer                                   on your head
Curtsy to your master
Throw a stone and get locked up.
Broke free and run away
Or suck up to the man til you're vacant
Your worth will go to Swansen
And you'll walk thru the bogs to the Capitol 
                        (Where all these bastards got started)

come everybody get down with me

get down and see you'll always drink

yourself to sleep you

smoke that J and then you peek

at me with your arms all dressed in sleaves

you make it wanna seem like you cant be beat

you make yourselves think. you envy me

and make it impossible to clean the tea.

we're not crazy at all...are we?

i had a vision.
and added a name.
to the listed i made yesterday.
i entitled it "hammered" and included
all the names of the people i know
who show up drunk every morning.

i was one of them. i used to be as drunk as they come.
now i'm only somewhat.
now i'm just a vision.
not quite blurry.
not as clear as i'd like.
but significant enough to matter.

my brain's off balance.
been off balance for a decade.
of decreasing brain matter i possess
a power to win the prize
of most atrocious waste of life.
most obvious waste of time.
here i am blogging.
when i should be asleep or studying.

what good does blogging do,
if no one's going to read it?
that's what i thought...none.

that's why God gave us...
...xanga...
...and myspace,

but have you ever noticed
how no one really adds blogs to myspace?
they make one post and then just leave it...
what's the point in that!
crrrrrrrrraaazy...
are we crazy at all?
probably,
to believe the propaganta they've been trying to sell us. to feed us.
hell yeah, we're crazy to believe that.
crrraaaaaaaaaaaazy...crraazay!