The years leading up to this blog ~Why I blog

My name is Savanah Cannard. I was born in 1990. Shortly after I was born my life was engulfed with abuse. The first 12 years of my life were spent solely trying to survive. Constant fear of messing up and facing physical punishment made me very jumpy, sexual abuse made me gain a lot of weight, and fear of something I'd say getting me taken away made me very antisocial. This all added up to make a perfect potion for teasing and cruelty at school, making me hopeless and suicidal by the time I was 12. Stress and having no escape at home or in public made me turn to self mutilation when I was 9. 14.5 years of living, 6 failed suicide attempts, and 3 addictions later I became a Christian. My life turned around, but I didn't let go of everything my childhood experiences gave me. A few things I have held on to include: special sense when something's wrong, knowing when it's not safe for me to be around, choosing words wisely, finding the best in every situation, ability to see beyond the ordinary in everyday life, and ability to laugh at just about anything. These traits help me with my writings as well. They put so many thoughts in my head, that I would go nuts having them all stay in there. That's why I blog, to get some of the stuff rambling in my head out.