Why do people seek attention? What is the attention the y seek? What is considered “good” and “bad” attention? Does it depend on the person or the thing they seek attention for? Why do I seek attention?? I know my friends and family love me to pieces. I know that because I hate to make them sad. But you know what I do at night when I can’t sleep? I imagine myself getting hurt or being really sad just so they can console me. I want the attention. Is that bad or good? I don’t even know what drives me to think those kinds of things. But somehow in my mentality it makes me feel better. It’s crazy and weird and I don’t understand it. I don’t even know what drives me to think of being hurt both mentally and physically, but for some reason I crave attention?
WHY do I seek this? Is it because I’m an only child? Is it because I don’t feel loved, even though I KNOW I am? IS this a test of my friends love? Why do I seek such attention? Am I lonely? What is it!?! I HATE not knowing my own feelings because then I feel that I don’t know myself. Is this attention seeking business a way to scream that I want to be taken care of? I have parents for that? Is it because I have never been in a relationship that I’m testing to see what guys will go for? I don’t understand what this is. What this attention seeking part of me is. I am an only child, what more attention do I need? Is it because I want attention from someone other than my parents? I love my parents to death. Why go for anything less than unconditional love? I can always count on my parents to love me. I know that they will love me through the good the bad and the ugly. So WHY? WHY do I seek attention from others? Is it because I know they could change their minds? Is it because I know at any moment something could be better than me and that they could leave me? I mean I don’t know what it is. I hate it. Why can’t I just be happy with the loving family that I have. That way I don’t have to depend on others undeclared love.
This guy I barely knew and met on the internet said I was the kind of girl who sought attention. The thing that hurt me the most is that he was RIGHT. I hate that some person I have never even met can figure out that I am an attention seeker. I know he’s right because I crave being the best person so that I can feel important enough to others. I want to be important. I want to be the one that gets invited to things. I don’t want to be left out of the fun in life. I want to be the one that is so cool that people want to talk to me. I want everyone to like me. I want to be included. I want to be the one who is remembered. I want to be the legacy. I want to be the one who does amazing things that make helps people. I want to shine. I want to be the “valedictorian” of life. I want to be the shining star, the star football player. I want people to remember the happiness they felt when they met me. I don’t want to be left out.
I don’t want to feel invisible to the world. I don’t want to walk as a ghost through life. I don’t want to be the shy one who people don’t want to talk to. I want to make the room come to halt as I enter. I want people to want to know me. I don’t want to blend into the world. I want to stand out. I want to matter. Is that such a bad thing?
Becoming Visible
By tezz - Posted on December 13th, 2008
Tagged: legacy
• random thoughts from my head; stream of conciousness
• Seeking Attention
• undeclared love
• Better future
Try to break up the blocks a bit more.
I think you answered your question beautifully. The only thing you need to do if you need all that attention is to:
"be the legacy. ... be the one who does amazing things that make helps people. ... to shine. ... to be the “valedictorian” of life. ... to be the shining star, the star football player."
Stop focusing on wanting that attention and start being what you want to be. The attention will grow as you do.
"Consistency is not a human trait" - Maude, from Harold and Maude
Thank you very much for your comments. Yeah in word it was split up more....but I hit the submit button too quickly.
Its pretty amazing how if you just write, you'll eventually reach a conclusion. That's why I love to blog.
I will be the person I want to be. I will become the one that I want to be! :D
I suppose we want attention because it proves someone cares.
Like what you've read? Well, then here's more:
http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/tricia0711
I don't think that's a bad thing. It just depends on how we initiate that attention. Maybe it bothers some people? I'm not sure. I like to make people feel like I care, because I could be that one person who changes their life. :)
my only suggestion reiterates what Turtlesuds already said, please put a little space between paragraph because the whole thing is one block of sentences and I'm a loser who wears glasses/contacts so eyes start hurting. ;(
"A person doesn't die when he should but when he can." - Gabriel Garcia Marquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude Fudge"It's the hard-knock life..."