In my family, except me, everybody works. This is a VERY good thing for me, because I get to be on my own and nobody’s bothers me or snoops around me. My dad doesn’t stay with us. So it’s me, my mum and my sister. Mum is a teacher and she leaves at 8:30am and comes back at 4pm. Whereas, I get home by 3 o’clock. This boils down to the fact that “Life is not fair.”
Everybody talks about the fact that the present generation is so unruly and insolent. And how parents don’t get to have good and healthy relations with their kids because of the above stated reason. I acknowledge the fact that there is generation gap, but can’t we look at it with more of a positive attitude.
Everybody is different; different opinions and perspectives. This in turn leads to conflicts at some point or the other. When everybody knows this fact, then why is there a hue and cry, when there is a disagreement between a mother and daughter. Both of which belong to different centuries. So basically, it’s like two different species have been asked to live together. In peace, not to forget.
My mom is Aries, so she is headstrong and fails to see things from people’s perspective; most of the times. So when mum decided to shift the computer (lovingly called “Milkshake”) and the T.V. in her room, I put my foot down. I love Milkshake, and can’t really do without her. I ain’t addicted to her, but I have to spend quality time with her so as not to have sleepless nights. Anyways, computers or TV’s aren’t supposed to be in bedrooms; neither parents nor kids. So I made her read each and every article that supported this theory. I tried talking her out of it. I tried making Dad change her mind.
All in vain. According to her, she needs Milkshake because she has to complete her school work. This is far more important than my “stupid” work. And the reason she wants Milkshake in her room and no where else- she doesn’t want to miss her T.V series. She’s my mom and not my sister, so there was no way I could bully her to go my way. So in a huge bedroom, we have computer and TV side by side. An interior designer would surely suffer from a stroke. Whenever we argue about such a ridiculous setup she blames me for being insolent and not respecting her. And during days when she is highly emotional, I would even get to hear lectures on how the present generations aren’t in tune with their parent’s needs and feelings. Unlike “her time.”
At times she is correct with her annoyance. But it’s such a breach of privacy, having your mom oscillating around you when you are in a middle of something. It also gets so awkward. It’s like there are pair of eyes boring in the backside of your head. Though it doesn’t happen always, but it does.
Now the matter doesn’t end here. I love listening to music and I hate using headphones. I like the amplified voice from the speakers. This infuriates my mom because she can’t listen to what’s going on in TV. Did I mention that I also like to sing along?
So whenever she objects, I always say, point blank, that it’s time to move Milkshake out, in order to have peace between both the parties. This, amazingly, silences her all the time. Although it doesn’t change the fact that she still can’t watch TV in peace. “Revenge is sweet.”
Though at times it does become a reason for a huge fight, but it ain’t like we are killing each other. So the psychologists don’t need to worry that we are heading to our doomsday. Rather than criticizing us, for being so rude and “generation with no heart”; I guess parents need to see and realize that even they can be wrong.
Perhaps you need to try compramise. for example, agree not to play your music above a agreed volume. Agree that the computer will be yours during a certain time of day so it doesn't interfere with your mom's work. Finally, perhaps you could save up to buy your own computer. Having a job would also get you out of the house and give you something to do.
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http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/tricia0711