“I want to be honest your Dad and I love each other, he is a great person.” That familiar phrase I have heard over a billion other times before. Here I go again speaking with one of my dad’s new internet girlfriends’ by e-mail. My goal was to write a more unique blog, but this is all I can think about right now. I am a very open-minded person, but with this subject not so much.
My dad is finally getting a house of his own after 13 years of living in this 200 year old relic. He has owned one house before when I was a baby. They both built the house of their dreams, but they lost it and decided to move to this stupid state. His motives are clear for getting a house; he wants his girlfriend to move in with us and we will all be a happy family again. That is a funny thought.
At first the thought of my dad finding another woman was very comforting and welcoming. Then after the 100th one it became annoying. She is excited to meet me and I am just bursting with joy! She seems very nice and I will give her a chance, but if I have to “steal” my mom’s stuff and hide it so she doesn’t get it I will. Actually I have already started slowly, but surely. The dresser will be hard to take, but I am sure I can work on that as well.
I find it funny how love sometimes can be so fickle at least in his world, and this is further burying how I feel about marriage and commitment. All I have left are my mom’s diaries, and her letters. I will find more of her writing and I am planning on combining my own writing and my mom’s into a book. My mom always wanted to write her own book, and this would be a way of combining our two abilities and fulfilling a dream.
I am not over my mom because she is a part of me that will live inside of my heart forever. This doesn’t hold me back from moving forward in my life, because the moment that you stand still your life can pass you by.
My dad always finds a way to get me mixed up in these predicaments, even when I try to stay out of it. It is my belief that although online dating is easier, the easy way is not always the best way to travel. Love really is not the answer after you have lost a spouse because the empty hole cannot be filled by another person’s love. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.
Why shouldn't your dad try to find love again? I mean, I understand that he isn't making the best choices, but would you damn him to a lonely life because your mom is gone? As long as he understands that another person in the picture won't replace your mom, it's not an unhealthy action to find someone new. Everyone needs a little companionship.
~C
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I've never been in a position like yours, so I can't possibly understand everything you're feeling, but I can empathize at least. It sounds like your dad is lost and possibly desparate, and the last thing anyone needs to see is their main authority figure in need of help. I'm glad that you're saving your mother so well; your idea about a book is beautiful. I'm also glad that you're giving your dad's girlfriend a chance, even if she's just another face in a crowd.
From reading this blog, I feel like you're a strong enough person to deal with whatever your dad brings home. If you ever feel like you need to freak out at him, here's the advice from a girl who gets cruel when angry: go for a run. Run, and then talk to him. Also, beware of the word "stupid." It's my least favorite word. It expresses nothing but the inability to express something. Nothing is ever stupid; everything has a reason. Look for the reason, and then find a more fitting adjective.
It sounds like you're handling life well, no matter what it throws at you. Good luck.
You are a strong person. You can handle whatever happens. But don't begrudge your dad a second chance at love. It is possible to love again... I've seen it with my grandmother.
And the idea of that book is wonderful. My grandmother is getting together all of my granddad's journals for me, because his dream was to write a book about the adventures he's had, but never got the chance to do it. So she wants me to do it. I feel like it'll be a beautiful way to cherish and preserve memories, for the both of us.
And that's comin' at ya' from yer local redneck hippie.
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Ooh, ooh, pick me, pick me!!!
I am not against the idea but he falls in love with someone new each week. I meet them at one point and like them then they stop talking to him. So it is more a problem with his stability more rather than another woman. I do want him to be happy and lead a healthy life, but he is just doing it in all the wrong ways. Too many woman and then one by one they leave so it is not healthy for him to move so quickly. The woman he has been dating now has only been with him about 2 months they love each I guess, but I guess I am just saying he is moving way to fast into everything. She is going to move as soon as he gets a house. I guess there were many points I was trying to make like 1.he needs to focus on himself before another woman which he hasn't done. such as getting a house etc. While he was wasting money visiting these woman he could have already had a house.
I understand where everyone is coming from I am just saying he is not doing things the correct way, but he never has with anything so I guess it makes sense.
http://www.progressiveu.org/043043-mom-i-can-finally-write-you-letter
Sorry to disappoint you, but I am voting for Lewis Black.
DrifterDani~