Its confirmed, boys are idiots and yet girls still can't live without them. Once you think that you can live without them and yet, you get this terrible feeling of discomfort once it all ends. In otherwards, as fall hits, I've been to feel again the remorse of change in the most negative form, that by this time next year I'll be without my best friend and no one could ever take her place. It's like we're almost sisters and can most of the time, guess what the other is going to say and we always have each other's backs even if no one else believes what we're talking about or ranting on and on about. Sadly, times do change and its the harsh reality that we have to come to terms with those changes and face them head on; in order to deal with and continue to move forward. Yet, here I am again in this endless merry-go-round where I consistenly feel "under the weather" because I can't seem to deal with all of the stress anymore like I used to. For instance, the other day I just started crying without any reason, just because I had become ashamed of the person of who I've been become these days; quiet, reserved, depressed and pessimistic about the future. These are all of course things of which in my nature, I'm not naturally supposed to be like, usually I'm outgoing, loud,happy-go-lucky so to speak, type A personality. Lately though I've been a shy, quiet, introvert because I feel so lost and alone.
There was one time when I felt this way back in junior high and the one thing that I held on to that got me through all of my stress and drama was music. Unfortunately, music doesn't hold the same outlet for me anymore but lately it seems like nothing has really lifted my spirits and its almost as if I can feel myself getting pulled further and further into an emo like state of mind where there is no light at the end of the tunnel metaphorically speaking of course.
And the funny thing is I feel like I'm the only person who really notices the difference in my character or maybe its the fact that my personality is changing but I just haven't learned to accept it yet.
Who knows really anymore in this chaos that we call life...?
just try to pick yourself up. You have to try because you will be stuck. Try some different methods this time, although you are sad you have to make yourself happy. If you would like read my blog on depression it is called Memoirs of Dani. This might benefit you and help you. You don't have to comment and I really don't care about the points I just want to help you. Keep your head up.
http://www.progressiveu.org/043043-mom-i-can-finally-write-you-letter
Sorry to disappoint you, but I am voting for Lewis Black.
DrifterDani~
Thanks for your concern, I read your entry about how to cope with depression. It was well written and had lots of great suggestions that I, myself am continuing to work on.
I think that at sometimes its like, you have to look at yourself and what type of person you've become i.e. soul searching as I define it as...in order to make yourself wake up from this terrible nightmare known as depression and get back on track to being the person that you always knew you were and are supposed to be.
And of course, isolation and ignorance aren't going to help me get over my depression and by eliminating those key elements, I can try to identify the roots of my depression and begin to resolve those issues so I can return to restoring my natural happy self.