We Die and Then Go to College

Maybe, just maybe, if we were all magnificent we could survive the intense world of college applications, standardized testing, and high school social lives. But not all of us are. In fact, most of us aren't. As if it weren't hard enough being a teenager, now, when entering our "funnest" year of high school, we are also given paper and online applications, multiple choice questions, thousands of essays, and friends and families to juggle.
Sure, looking back to this day 10 years from now we may all think of how much fun and freedom we were granted. How much trouble we got ourselves into and how great we looked "back then". But 10 years from now we won't be gifted with uncontrollable hormones, wild urges to find trouble, and hysterical impulses to be irritated, annoyed, and just plain stupid.
"It really isn't that hard to just do your work and stay obedient!" she yelled at me from across the room. The fact of the matter is... it is. It is hard to work and not procrastinate until it's too late. It is hard to be attentive and obedient. It's hard to just "be good" in general at the age of 17.
It seems to me that no matter how we work or what we do we will always be 17 years old. We are told that we can't vote at 17, we aren't adults yet, we can't even choose what movies to watch. Yet we are responsible enough to take on school, jobs, and the rest of our futures.
Okay, so I know that I am not the only one confused with all of this college application stuff. I know I am not the only one baffled by these essays, short responses, and general applications. We are all stunned.
So here it goes... my philosophy on "SENIOR YEAR". I'll start from the end and lead you to the beginning.
We push open those enormous, white, medieval looking doors to our dream colleges. Just like the gate to heaven, these doors seem to float open and cox you in. To get to heaven though we have to seize to exist. And we do.
So now we go back to the beginning.
"YOU HAVE MAIL!!" she screamed as if it were the death of her. Mail? This isn't mail, it's spam. "The College of Youdontcareaboutusbutwewillstillkeepsendingyouthesepamphlets would like to encourage you to apply." Alright so they think I'm good enough, that's great. This "mail" comes in the first day of senior year (if not earlier). It wouldn't be as invasive if it came once or twice and just waited for your response or forgot your existence. But, unfortunately, these institutions don't forget and they aren't patient. So the letters, brochures, pamphlets, all of these, pile up as the University of Whoknows, the College of Whateveryousay and Noonewantstoattend University keep on sending. So, with good intentions, you keep these papers in a corner of your room and promise yourself that you will get back to them eventually. Well, "eventually" took longer than you expected.
Then, out of nowhere, Mydream College send you a postcard looking paper with your name on it. WOW! Now, this one goes up on your wall or bulletin board or wherever you keep your most prized possessions and stays in your mind until you realize that this great message is sent to all of the other student that have the same ranged SAT or ACT score that you have. HA! They got you! They fooled you into thinking that you are special.
Okay, okay... Sorry I was being a little bit pessimistic there. I know some of you ARE special.
Now, it's almost time to submit your first application and you don't know jack about your college. So out come these brochures, pamphlets, out comes all the information about all of these places that seemed so far away only 2 months ago. And now is the time to track down all of your teachers and counselors. No time for friends and family anymore.
This is when we start dying. This is when we start seeing our times at the movies, pools, beaches, parks, and skating rinks drift away. Sooner or later your weekends are spent at Barnes and Noble or on your couch in front of your laptop doing research and trying to be the best college applicant those admissions officers have ever encountered. Unfortunately, there is no such thing as a perfect college applicant. These rare creatures do not exist. Again, this is when your common sense tends to disappear and we all die a little more.
After about a dozen weekends indoors trying to master the skills of essay writing and educated guessing you start to realize that maybe you just aren't what that dream college is looking for. So you turn yourself into the ultimate "Yaley" or "Harvardian" or even "University of Florida Girl". Here we get closer to finishing up our existence.
And then, out of the blue, right before all the interviews with renown alums and admin officers, we have an epiphany. "THIS ISN'T YOU!" Hmmm...
Maybe I was trying to be someone I'm not. Maybe, I should try being myself and these colleges will end up loving me. Just, maybe...
So you go to these college visits, interviews, etc. with your newfound spirit. Now all there is to do is WAIT.
Be patient your parents say to you. Calm down, you'll get in. This is what they repeat day in and day out. But their words don't make time go any faster. So everyday you have to wait on these colleges responses to your pleads of acceptance as the days seem to get longer and longer. You start to feel like an inflatable pool toy that eventually deflates very slowly after being under the pressure of just a little bit too much weight. Everyday you deflate a little bit more. Just as that last breath of air that was blown into you is let out, hope floats in. You have reached the end. But then...
"YOU HAVE MAIL!" you hear again. This time though, it's real. You're in! Mydream College has accepted you and you can now open up this metaphorical gate to heaven. Sure, you haven't experienced the SENIOR YEAR you were hoping for. But look at the people who have. They are lying on their best friend's coach with great expectations awaiting them at their state's community college.
Trust me, it is possible to be both a competitive college applicant AND a socialite. That is if the college you dream of is the one across the street with 5 classrooms, 3 teachers, and 19000 students. If you're that other type of applicant, the one hoping for money in the future and a successful life, then you need to come to the hard truth that applications and hard work are more important than high school parties and hard liquor. TIME MANAGEMENT! Once you realize this universal truth, YOU'RE IN!