So talking to my neighbors today made me realize a couple of things: 1) fear doesn't help you accomplish anything useful...you just end up sounding and acting like a nut (I've been sounding and acting like a nut a lot lately, I want to stop that and move with direction and purpose..) and 2) fear gives you stomachaches, making you even more useless 3) fear gets in the way of perfectly fun evenings, spent, say square dancing.
So I've been using way, way too much of my energy being afraid this past week; afraid of things happening with the economy, afraid of drama happening at my school, again, with finances, afraid of being homeless forever, afraid of becoming one of those old homeless people you see walking around downtown yelling at people about stints in the mental hospital, afraid of never being gainfully employed again. Someone asked me "why would a rewilder like yourself be afraid?" A valid question, since many of my rewilder and anarchist friends are actually celebrating the fall of the stock market and the economy...but as I see it, those friends of mine who are celebrating all of this are in denial, since they are very much reliant upon the very system they possess to hate, as am I. Many of these friends live on dumpstered food, roadkill and food stamps, and sometimes eating at Food Not Bombs...all of these methods of meeting their food needs are very much linked to having a functioning economy; even the roadkill, which obviously won't exist without gas-filled cars to run the poor little critters over. True, people can begin to hunt, fish and farm again to get food, but seriously, can almost seven billion people fill their bellies daily with the land we have left to subsist on? Do we have enough know-how to get by? And not only that, but can we give up the luxuries of everyday life and still be sane? I'm not sure I can...
Tonight, just to feel "balanced," I had to resort to crying in a tub full of hot water on the cell phone to my friend Jasmine; and then I had to drink two giant cups of nettle tea and write this blog...and I'm just starting to feel a little settled down. And nothing particularly traumatic has happened to me; no-one I know has jumped off a bridge because of the stock market collapse; so far, everyone I know and love is still alive and healthy, our lives haven't changed yet. And yet, I feel terror all around me; I'm frightened when I go talk to my neighbors who are packing up and moving out right now, because they feel major metropolitan areas are "too dangerous," I'm frightened when I go downtown and it seems every second person is panhandling for change...and every person who asks me for money gets the response from me "well I'm homeless too..." It is frightening that half of my class at midwifery school is currently unemployed; people are being fired and laid off like there is no tomorrow, it is frightening that I'm already considering the sex industry because jobs are so hard to come by in Portland these days. I'm reasoning with myself, thinking things like "well maybe I could just give hand jobs for money, that couldn't be that bad...right?" I'm thinking again about selling my eggs, even though I feel this is way, way against my ethics...(I'm not sure giving hand jobs for money is...)
the truth is, things have been really scary for a while now, its just that in the past three weeks or so, people have really begun to examine how scary things have really gotten...how desperate times have become.
Love ya,'
Carrot
Interesting post...I'm a tad confused about what a rewilder is though; care to enlighten me? I was shocked that your anarchist friends are celebrating the bad times of the Stock Market, but I was even more shocked when you listed food stamps as a source of food for them. That seems insanely hypocritical: believe in anarchy and yet expect handouts from the government you claim to be against.
I think if you can live on dumpstered food and roadkill, you'd be very much able to give up the luxuries that you rely upon now. But don't forget that the media expects your fear, and preys upon it. If none of the newspapers had written about the first crash on Wall Street, do you think the subsequent crashes would have happened? The following crashes weren't just based on stock brokers and people like that, they were based on the American people getting scared, and therefore, stopping spending their money out of *fear*. I have a friend who, every day, tells me America is headed for a depression and we're going to be stuck in Korea for the rest of our lives and nar nar nar...and, every day, I tell her to relax, and think positively.
We're supposed to be afraid, but not being afraid is going to be a lot more productive.
k
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view my blog! http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/49917
I needed that comment...I've sorta let fear overtake my life the past few weeks...definitely not a healthy way to live/be. As for what a rewilder is...well, that is hard to say, since each and every rewilder defines themselves a bit differently...I think of myself as a rewilder because I try to encourage and support the wild, both in myself, in others, and in the environment. How do I do this? Well, I forage wild foods, I learn about medicinal and edible plants, I learn to identify different trees, animals, tracks, shit, I'm hoping to learn to tan hides this winter, I ask lots of questions about everything around me, I learn lots of techniques in midwifery school to help babies be born in a biodynamic manner (meaning with as few interventions as possible,) I try to start fires with both a bow-drill and a hand-drill...I practice archery...I make tinctures...skills like that. That is basically what rewilding is about; learning how to thrive and survive in nature if need be.
I also encourage the wild by planting native trees, teaching kids about the environment, getting rid of invasive species (some anyway,) like English ivy which chokes out native trees (all trees really,) talking with trees/plants/wild animals, singing to trees/plants/wild animals, sometimes helping a local branch of Earth First! with little projects, things like that. I especially like to encourage this kind of eco-kookiness in people I know...I tell them to sing/talk to plants as well, to compost their shit, to make tinctures...because getting to know the earth that intimately is, I believe, the first step in saving Her.
I think we all need desperately to fall madly in love with the Gaia or whatever you want to call Her...in order to turn things around. And that is why I am a rewilder.
As far as anarchists using food stamps goes...some would say this is not hypocritical at all, since they are taking money from the government that the government would otherwise use to further other projects (war, bombing, more war,) so they feel they are helping to bring down said government by taking as much as possible from said government. I have food stamps for some of those reasons; I'm not sure I want to bring down the government, although admittedly, it needs more work at this point then many be worth trying to patch together...kinda like an old house. Anyway, my reasons are more along the lines of 1) I've paid lots of taxes over my lifetime, so I might as well get some of that money back 2) the government will spend this money on war likely if I don't use it for food 3) my foraging/dumpstering/roadkill collecting doesn't completely keep me fed..and I'm hungry, damn it!
Love ya,
Carrot
You are amazing.
I know I risk sounding a little crazy, but the truth is that for the past 3 years I have been obsessed with the idea that it won't be long before life on this planet changes completely.
I was so obsessed with it in fact that it was causing me to become depressed, only because I felt that everything I do now, working, paying bills, trying to save for a house, would soon come to not matter at all, and I will have sacrificed time I could have been preparing for this inevitability (even if it is only inevitable in my own psyche), and/or being with my family.
I actually got so weirded out on this, and so anxious, that I called a psychic. She said, "Wow, you really are preparing for the apocolypse!" (She couldn't tell me if it was or was not going to happen though, but she did encourage me that the best thing I could do was live in the now. Not necessarily psychic, but I needed to hear it.)
Anyway, I didn't know if my obsession was my own psychic prophecy, or a delusion, but it was consuming me. I kept thinking about what I would do if one day the earth does stand still, or more likely erupt in a 3rd World War centering on American soil. I had horrible vivid nightmares for months.
It could just be that I am plagued by my childhood obsession with the book of Revelation.
Anyway, what I really want to say, is that if something like that did happen, it is people like you who would likely survive, and would hopefully gather and teach others how to coexist with the planet. So I want to say, thank you, and maybe you can guide those of us who are still attached to living in homes and having cellular phones, and internet, for that matter.
As for my own resolution, I resolved I would not do anything drastic based on the possibility that such a thing might occur, but if it did, I think in a weird way, I might actually feel relieved, and able to live life the way humans were meant to live it, that is if I survived.
"Consistency is not a human trait" - Maude, from Harold and Maude
Just putting it out there:
If my "visions" are more than fears and delusions, this is what I actually would predict:
The above scary scenario about a 3rd World War will happen if John McCain is elected.
If Obama is elected, we may still face a global disaster, but people will have shifted in their understanding. They will be more aware that to survive humans must forget about their individual self and start to care about the human race. If not, we risk becoming an extinct species. Like dinosaurs.
I find it slightly ironic that I'm reading this while contemplating writing a blog about how courage is fickle and I want nothing to do with it.
But you're right. Fear doesn't do any good. And it's an annoying pain in the butt. I've definitely learned that first hand...
And that's comin' at ya' from yer local redneck hippie.
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Ooh, ooh, pick me, pick me!!!
That sounds awesome; please write it. :-)
"What a crazy random happenstance!"
Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog
Read my Blog!
I did write it. It took me the better part of two hours to get my thoughts into a form that people who aren't me could understand. So if you want to read it, just click on that link in my signature, and it'll take you right to my blog. ^-^
And that's comin' at ya' from yer local redneck hippie.
--
Ooh, ooh, pick me, pick me!!!
Is that so!
Do know, you’re not alone, lol.
Going to follow the link now,
;-)
http://www.wowzone.com/monkey.htm
People have fear for a reason though. Fear is to help push you to avoid the things you're afraid of. For example, if you're afraid of the economy failing, then most likely, you will work towards making it better. Or, if you're afraid of being poor, you'll go out and work hard to make money to avoid that situation. It's also a protection device. Read Daniel Dennett's book Breaking the Spell; or at least the chapter referring to HAAD (I believe it stands for Hyper-Active Agent Device). He describes why it is necessary for people to be afraid. An example used is, if a bird is sitting in a tree and hears something fall (such as a twig), the bird's immediate reaction is to fly away. This is because, a snake (or other being wishing to cause harm to the bird) could be the cause of the twig falling. Therefore, the bird knows it should take precaution, and in this situation, the fear that the movement was caused by a snake, potentially saves the bird's life. It's just better to be on your guard. It can be a nuissance at times, but where do you think the phrase "It's better to be safe than sorry" come from? Good Luck.
Lauren
http://www.wowzone.com/monkey.htm
You are right, fear does have it's place. It is an instinct, and it should be paid it's due respect. The problem is that most people give their fear too much power, and lose perspective. I have been at my most powerful when I was deathly afraid, my heart pounding in my ears. The fact that I was still able to disarm an angry psychotic kid of the 9 inch peice of glass he was holding to my throat proves to my that fear can be a great tool in survival. However if a person is inexperienced with fear, and lets fear lead to panic, they have just become exposed and vulnerable. In the face of dangerous fight or flight situations, they are less likely to survive.
"Consistency is not a human trait" - Maude, from Harold and Maude