On our first date, we saw "Riding in Cars with Boys." The lead character ends up alone.
I had no idea it was foreshadowing.
We were thirteen. At nineteen we married, and now at twenty-one we're no longer together.
I know there's that common knowledge of being "too" young. But the real problem is this idea of marriage. How can some people completely disregard the entire institution of marriage?
After we had been married for a few months, I found out about all of the other girls he was with before we were married. Then, in November, after returning from thanksgiving with my family, he received a midnight phone call. He told the person on the other end that they could 'come over' as soon as I left. He promised.
He'd been cheating on me for a while. The Marine Corps brought him up on charges of adultery. I don't really know what the verdict was, I don't trust him.
We tried to make it work after that. We tried. Things were much better for about three months. But the lies, and the late night, early waking to watch porn continued. I couldn't take it anymore. I went to stay with a friend for a while. He didn't even care.
I came home. He told me that he had already told our landlord we would be moving out.
I haven't even seen him since last June. I haven't talked to him. I don't even think I remember what it was like for us to be together and to be happy. Who am I kidding. I don't remember. I try, but I don't.
I know he's out with other women. But we're still married. How can he behave that way, while we're still married? What kind of mother raises her son to have no respect for being married? At least he could man up and divorce me. As for why I haven't filed. I guess there's some stupid little girl fantasy of me wanting to make it work. Like I think maybe one day he'll grow up.
But I should face it. We aren't even the same people anymore. I don't even know him.
