There was a pregnant lady on the train. She looked about 50 years old. Her hair was a mess and she had a worn out bookbag behind her. The lady was holding up a sign made out of cardboard box that said, "Please help save my baby." At first, I wanted to give her like...a dollar because I didn't have much with me. So I did have my last dollar and gave it to her. She gave me the brightest smile! I was happy. Then there was a businessman sitting next to me. He gave her probably $5-$10. The lady was really thankful and reached her hand out to shake his. But, he just slapped her hand down and made a disgusting face. I could tell the woman was hurt and she looked like she was about to cry.
After that, she slowly moved to another train cart. My stopped came and I was about to get off with my friends. Then something told me to help her, so I jumped back into the train and followed her. lol My friends were so shocked. Anyway, after observing her for a while I decided to ask her nicely, "Ma'am, would you like to sit down?" Oh boy, you should've seen other people's face. The lady looked at me and said, "Yes!" and she just broke down.
Her name was Iris. She was 45 years old. Her husband left her as soon as he found out she was pregnant. I asked her, "You can't be serious, why aren't you at home taking care of yourself?" She let out a small laugh and told me she had no home. Iris needed the money to pay for some decent food, shelter and medical attention. So, I asked her again why didn't she just go to a homeless shelter. She looked at me in a funny way and told me that she had been to numerous homeless shelter because a church advised her to. But homeless shelters are filled with theives. They stole almost everything from her. She only had a shirt, a pair of pants, a broken comb, and about $20 made up of coins. We talked for a while and I learned what kind of harsh things people had said to her.
I didn't know what to do because I already gave her my last dollar. I asked her how much does she need, she told me about $160 for this shelter for pregnant girls. The shelter would provide her a nice home, counselors, and doctors. She told me the name but I forgot already. I decided, I had to do something.
I took her to my house and told her I need to go home to get the money. My parents weren't home at the time so I thought, why not? My sister helped me too. She told me to give Iris some new clothes, socks, vitamins, and everything else we could think of. I even gave her my favorite book bag...and $200. My sister gave me another $24 to buy Iris unlimited one week metro card. Oh my god, Iris kept on calling me an angel so many times and I got so red.
I've left out many details. But the point I'm writing this is to say that not all beggars are bad. You just need to come to your own conclusion. I am a little bit upset that there are people out there who begged because it's an easy way to make money. At the same time, at least you can put money on the table and let them decide which path to take. Sure, they can use the money to buy drugs or alcohol. If you don't give them at all...do you know what they'll do? They'll steal....or even kill. If they ask, just give them at least a quarter you know...it doesn't hurt anyone. And yes, my friends think I'm stupid for giving so much money to Iris. I even gave her my phone number and I believe she knew where I live. But she never called or came to visit. I think that's a good sign. Money goes around and comes around. Sometimes, you should give too. You'll feel better than bitter. You really wil.
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Wow. You are brave to take her to your house. But it goes to show that we can't make assumptions about our lives and make conclusions off of it. There are people out there who really don't deserve this. i am glad you didn't assume, but you bothered to actually listen and make a difference in some one's life. When this baby is born, this woman will often tell it about you, and so this story isn't finished. Often, we as humans can be angels to those around us, we bring heaven down to them-if we just go the extra mile. Good job!
Thanks for understanding! I know some people really don't deserve it. And I think that decent people would try their best to get at least a job if they're really in trouble. It is hard to see if the other person is lying. Either way, they must be desperate to be begging for money. Even I wouldn't.
Yeah, I wonder why homeless people often choose to stand outside instead of getting a job? In THe Pursuit of Happiness, the man wasn't stopped even though he was homeless. If people really want to, they will get a job no matter what it takes
While I agree with you to a certain degree, I think there is a perspective that you are missing in this. Trust me, I get just as annoyed as the next person with beggars that choose to beg outside of businesses, such as stores or restaurants. I think to myself, you're here already, go in and apply. There are some that are capable of that, but then again, there are some that are not. Just think, to have and maintain a job, you have to have a place to get good rest, shower, get dressed, and an alarm clock to get up on time to be there. When you are homeless, most often you feel hopeless. It's like a big vicious cycle. No home, but they need a job to get a home. No clothes to wear, but they need clean ones to put on for work. No shower, but they need to be clean to go to work. You get the point. That's just for the homeless that don't have mental problems.
Many of the homeless and beggars have severe mental problems or health problems that inhibit them from contributing as a "normal" person would. The health care system does not help these people. Where are they supposed to go to get and maintain medication to assist with their mental condition? The fact is they are neglected members of society. Granted there are a lot of homeless that could probably do something about their situation, but when you are depressed and feel at rock bottom, it's hard to think and act rationally.
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
I agree. Many of these people are retarded and a huge percentage of them have brain problems.
I always get asked for money and I always feel guilty if I have some that I can spare and don't give so I end up always giving two dollars here, another dollar there
but i know some people have made it their life style and some are using it for alcohol but some do need it
and I just leave it upto whoever is up there to be the judge, i feel guilty if i don't give
when I know I will probably get some more from somewhere
so I am really gald to read such a tale as yours and motivated by things like this
thanks for sharing
"Pride is concerned with who is right. Humility is concerned with what is right."
"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter." - Twain
yes, but again I don't feel sorry for ALL the homeless people. So many people out there are homeless teens standing on the corner with their girlfriends. I am sorry but they are not disabled, they are young and can still get a job. It angers me that they threw their life away to be homeless and get free money for the rest of their lives.
that you don't agree on with me?
I mean i didn't say that anywhere (that is feel sorry for ALL homeless people)
I also think that people who are taking the easy way out are using/abusing the people who are good and charitable
"Pride is concerned with who is right. Humility is concerned with what is right."
http://www.progressiveu.org/231615-this-is-a-muslim-girls-plight
No, I wasn't disagreeing with you at all! That was just a side point of mine that had nothing to do with your response. Sorry. I am sorry that I made you feel that way. No, there are a lot of things that I agree with you about.
i'll take your word for it
:)
"Pride is concerned with who is right. Humility is concerned with what is right."
http://www.progressiveu.org/231615-this-is-a-muslim-girls-plight
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
Yeah I totally agree that there are lots of homeless people, not all, that use and abuse generous overly kind people. In the old days, way way back, homeless people used to take advantage of good people by faking blindness, or cover one eye with a patch, or roll up their sleeve and make it look like they lost an arm. People aren't stupid these days, so homeless people today take advantage by writing pity signs, which of course everyone questions. Hmm., i wonder what is next.
i believe that all or most homeless people are scam artists. i was walking down a street in the city and i saw a homeless man standing on the corner w/ a cardboard sign. i didn't give him anything just because he was scary. lol. but anyway...i walked back that way about 5 hours later and i saw him TALKING ON HIS CELL PHONE and getting into his CAR. yea he was some homeless person. the most i will ever do for a homeless person is give them food. i will never give them money.
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
LAst night we gave a homeless man our leftovers still warm from a fancy restaurant, he was right outside in the cold, and we gave him change. IT was so sad to see such a poor but kind person like that.
Wow. You ARE brave to take her to your house. But you are even more kind to give her that much money and your fav bookbag! This, it's entireity is absolutely amazing--and I commend, and thank you for it.
I know if my parents were home I would have gotten in SO much trouble. Even if I gave the stuff that I bought with my own money, and if I gave money I earned. My parents are good people and come from a tough life themselves. If anything, the reason of their potential anger towards me (again if I was in your situation and my parents WERE home) would only be reflections of concern for my safety and the safety of the family.
Great job, and thank you again.
TCho
So true. My parents would get mad too that I would put myself at risk with a homeless lady who knows where I live, can stalk, steal something from your house either while you went to go get the book bag or when you are gone later. Scary. I am definitely NOT as trusting as you
Yes, I agree that people should give to beggars and how arrogant was that man for slapping down Iris' hand when she was making a kind gesture.
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
I know! I understand that the man wasn't interested in helping. But did he HAVE to slap her hand? What a jerk. Or could it be that he sw right through and the homeless lady is not as kind and innocent as everyone here assumes she is.
I just got the chills and everything.... Wow, go you!
I always try to give money to homeless people when I see them, but my parents and older siblings always scowl at me or tell me not to.
I'm so happy to know that someone out there is helping.
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Sarcasm is my body's natural response to stupidity.
Buying used books is wrong, it's like buying used underwear, it just shouldn't be done.-Me
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
WEll, I can tell when homeless people are addicted to stuff and you can see that they are suffering with their addictions> The suffering shows on their face and that is all that they are living for. To feed their addiction. it is really really sad. Who am I to look down on them? So I will donate, but I don't ever donate to teens or young people because HELLO they are young, obviously healthy, often times with a girlfriend and they obviously ran away from home or something. They made a dumb choice MAYBE. But they can still get a job. If people stopped being so free with donating their money, we wouldn't have designated streets for bums who stick around for decades because they know that they will still get money if they don't work. We would have young people who know better than to beg, and will look for a job.
I really admire you in some ways. I think it's wonderful that you have such genuine generousity. It's quite rare. And I agree,some people are force to live that life because of situations we wouldn't even dream of. I don't think anyone would want to lead that life out of free will. Everyone has a story. You'll never learn it unless you ask, which you did, that's why I think you're quite wonderful.
I am one to give needy people a dollar whenever I get the chance. I am not sure if what I am doing is a good thing. Am I helping them? Or am I just opening new doors to alcohol, etc. I am all for buying them a sandwich or something, donate clothes. = ) I think it's a wiser decision, maybe.
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
One way to see if they really need the money is to go buy them a sandwich PERSONALLY and give it to them. OR give them the coat of your back. If they don't take it or demand something better "suited", which many of them did do, they don't need it. I once bought a homeless man a sandwich and he said "what, you couldn't get me a double whopper?" and didn't take it. So thats why I barely give money any more. I have had some experences that go to show homeless people are just laze excuses for not seeking a job.
i'm the last person to turn down giving to the needy, and although i do as well admire your extreme generosity, there might have been a safer way to handle the situation. Possibly not this specific one, but other homeless beggars. i was once told by a past teacher that we should make sure there are plenty of people around, take them somewhere for a quick meal. unfortunately if you give a complete stranger $, you dont necessarily know its going to. we could be feeding a crack addict for all we know when all we have are good intentions for the well-being of complete strangers.
*shrugs*
but i am glad that in your perticular stituation, the path you chose worked out for you and Iris
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
I agree. I have to say that what you did was nice but STUPID. DO you have any idea what kind of danger you put yourself in? the Bible says "mY people perish because of lack of knowledge." Not to bang the bible on you, but its a good quote that shows that innocent gullible trusting people end up in trouble. So next time, please think. okay?
I think you were wise to give her material things, in addition to the money. I have given people money many times in the hopes that they will spend it for what they implying they need the money for. The best way to approach giving people something is to give them what they say they need the money for. If they don't take the object, then it's pretty safe to say they didn't need the money for what they were asking for, but rather something else. Who knows what that is, and like you said, if you didn't give the money, the person could possibly steal from someone or hurt someone to get the money from someone else.
Good for you hanging onto the compassion we are all born with. Some choose to become arrogant, like the man who slapped Iris's hand as if she were less than a human being, or selfish all together and ignore the needs of others around them. I have been burned many times through trying to help people. Many times I have been at the gas station and someone will ask me for some money to feed their kids, or that they need a $1 to get some gas in their car.
I choose to give in a different manor. I love working at the nursing home. It's instant gratification to work with the elderly and sick that have been left behind by their families. Anything that you do for them, even in their moments of insanity, is appreciated. Minor things like taking the time to pick them out an outfit that actually matches to put on, or taking the time to make sure they get showered well, or giving them a well-overdue haircut brings such happiness to them. They are encouraged to get up in the morning knowing that a dependable person is coming in to help them through their daily routine. It's my absolute passion to work with these individuals.
So, if anyone feels like they are in the giving mood and doesn't want to do it in a monetary way for fear of the money getting spent on the wrong things, volunteer at a nursing home. Go in and play a hand of cards with them, go and sit and talk with them about how life used to be, go and share a laugh with them. So many of these people have worked all their lives to have everything, I mean EVERYTHING, stripped from them to pay the outrageous per day charge to stay in the nursing home.
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
Good job on volunteering at nursing homes. It is so sad that kids dump their parents at a nursing home, like a mom dumps her child at an orphanage. Old people don't want to spend their time with other old strangers. They want to be with their family. Don't you think that they deserve it? They didn't feed clothe and love you all their life to have you forget aobut them when their kids are grown up. Thats why I like foreign cultures more than American. Foreign cultures teach RESPECT and taking care of the old unto their death. I don't like what I see in America.
It is very sad to see so many of our elderly just left behind by family and close family friends. You are right, older Americans have worked all their lives to make America what it is today. It's not fair that they are stripped of everything they own because they need care for a while. I have seen many of them lose their houses, pensions, and bank accounts. I know that I will never leave my parents alone when they get older and maybe have to live in a nursing home. You are correct that other cultures seem to value their elderly more than Americans do.
It's people like you that keep the world from dissolving completely into hate. =)
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
Its also people like you that end up in TROUBLE for taking complete strangers to their house. ITs like myspace users who invite complete strangers to their house and end up in certain situations because they were too trusting and stupid.
It is also people like you that keep the bums on their corners every day, too lazy to look for work, because they know that some poor gullible person will always be there to donate that 1 dollar.
Wow... that's something to hear. I'm speechless becuase you don't hear stories like this everyday. Or at least I don't. I hope that lady got back on her feet and is doing well.
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
I just hope that the lady used the money for a good reason. What if that lady got drunk and died that night because she had too much to drink because SOMEONE gave her a lot of money in the first place??!!! By donating money you may have made the situation worse and you may have made the homeless' mothers' child an orphan. I am so sick of everyone here glorifying what she did. ITs wrong, stupid, and not safe. IN my opinion, its plain wrong.
i think that what you did was really genuine. slightly above and beyond what you could of done. but definitely sincere. we can all go back and forth about what you did and if taking her to your house was a good idea or not...but in the end...you are recognized for doing a good deed. and i think that no matter what she did with the money, she appreciated it and you cant change her way of life. so, more power to ya! lol
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
Actually, read the above comment I made. She CAN change her life-for the worse. Consider this scenario:
She donates lots of money feeling good because she thinks she is feeding the homeless lady.
The lady turns around ad buys alcohol or whatever is offered on the street. She overdoses and dies because SOMEONE gave her the money and therefore the chance to do it.
She changed the woman's life and if the woman has a child, she made the child an orphan
So yes, it was sincere. it was also a stupid attempt to attain false piety
This is awesome. I don't know that I would have had the courage to bring her to my house just because of safety reasons, but like you said they aren't all bad.
I think you did a good thing, and I think this woman genuinely need it and appreciated it...Just be careful because others may not. I hope she has a healthy baby and can get back on her feet
.☼. Bre .☼.
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
You guys, stop glorifying this situation and stop encouraging people to "have the courage" to do stupid things and invite bums to our houses.
I don't know, I still wouldn't trust her because chances are she could have used it for something else. And you risked a lot by helping her. you risked your house, your life-and I BET YOU she is back on the street because the money is gone. If she is homeless she doesn't have a job, and if she doesn't have a job then the money is LONG GONE. You should be thankful you are still here. I don't think that your behavior should be condoned or complemented.
DISCLAIMER: I am not being rude. I'm stating my opinion. No personal attacks are meant. Please give some leniency on how you take my words. imagine me saying them with a smile. ^__^
First off, let me say that I have nothing against homeless people. However, it was a very dangerous thing you did to take Iris to your home, and you are a very lucky person that no harm came of it. I'm glad that you helped someone who really needed it, and I hope next time you at least call your father or someone else older for help and support, just in case.
On that note... I once went to Rome as part of a group of student. To make a long story short, some of the students befriended a homeless teenager named Topher (maybe this wasn't even his real name). Topher was real nice... until he did some really strange things, and some of my fellow students ended up getting chased through the streets of Rome. The bottom line is, even if somebody seems really nice, and you want to help them, don't trust. Be kind, be polite, and by all means help them if you can, but NEVER EVER trust them.
P.S. You are a great person for being so kind and sweet!
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
AMEN! I completely agree. They are all or for the most part, scam artists. and I wouldn't give them anything more than food. Yet people always feel sorry for them. WHy? Why don't they feel sorry for the kids in orphanages who may have a roof over their head, yes, but they have no family, the owner doesn't treat them right or takes the money for herself, etc. This is a totally new topic to some people because there isn't enough coverage over it. Instead, everyone is crying over the homeless bums who are too lazy to work, while the bums make money off of their laziness. And they always will continue that way because american society is wired that way.
I've taken homeless people home with me many a time, but never have I given them $200; usually I just cook a meal for them and offer a hot shower and maybe some new socks. In my opition, you did exactly what we should all be doing; the world would be a whole lot nicer to live in and a lot more trusting if we started giving people the responsibility of being trust-worthy...
Do you know why Canadians rarely lock their doors? Why Africans trust everyone in their village with their kids? Because both of these cultures frown upon the kind of mistrust and narrowmindedness that we, the American culture, has cultivated. We have a high crime rate and all sorts of nasty, crazy things happening PRECISELY BECAUSE WE DON'T TRUST EACH OTHER. If we could cultivate a culture of trust, not only would we be more generious toward each other, thus eliminating the motivation to steal for a lot of desperate people, but we would build up the self-esteem of these people, by showing them we trust them with something as personal as our own house.
When I was homeless, I always felt honored when someone invited me home; therefore I never stole anything from the people who kindly fed and sheltered me. I was greatful for everything they gave me, so I wouldn't dream of hurting them by stealing from them. Similarly, all of the homeless I've ever invited home have felt the same way; they always seem very greatful for all the respect and humanness you show them, so they respect back.
I'm not afraid to invite the homeless home, nor do I turn hitchhikers away. All humans deserve love and respect; none are scarier then I myself am. If there is any lesson in life to be learned, it is that we could all, given the right circumstances stoop low enough to be Hitler; but if we should chose, we also all have the potiental to be more kindly then Jesus. Jesus, by the way, was famous for inviting the homeless, prostitutes, even tax guys home with him.
This girl deserves a halo...
Love ya,
Carrot
I agree with what you said completely...i feel the need to help any one any way that i can, no matter who they are, what they do, or where theyre from... however some people over look the love of a caring person. My neighbor's mother picked up a man who's tire had blown up and he needed a ride. He ended up pointing a gun at her and he forced her to drive out by Lake Springfield. It was there that he shot her and burried her and stole her car... I have always remembered her story knowing that you cannot trust people just by their appearance, but this has never caused me to stall when i feel that some one needs help desperately. If some one hurts a person for helping them, not only are they idiotic, but they're also making their lives even worse. I'm not afraid of dieing for a good cause, and at least i know my neighbor's mom (Philis Liles) died a good, honest women trying to help a person in need.
-x-Rose-x-
I agree with what you said completely...i feel the need to help any one any way that i can, no matter who they are, what they do, or where theyre from... however some people over look the love of a caring person. My neighbor's mother picked up a man who's tire had blown up and he needed a ride. He ended up pointing a gun at her and he forced her to drive out by Lake Springfield. It was there that he shot her and burried her and stole her car... I have always remembered her story knowing that you cannot trust people just by their appearance, but this has never caused me to stall when i feel that some one needs help desperately. If some one hurts a person for helping them, not only are they idiotic, but they're also making their lives even worse. I'm not afraid of dieing for a good cause, and at least i know my neighbor's mom (Philis Liles) died a good, honest women trying to help a person in need.
-x-Rose-x-
That was an amazing story. I am really glad to know that you helped her out, possibly saved her life. I have a similar story to yours...i only wish i could have helped the man i gave money to out more. My dad would've been so mean to him, i just didn't want to put him through that. So i gave him $50 and my 2 friends gave him $25 each...its true though, nothing makes you feel better then when you see them smile and hear them saying thank you and God bless you. It just makes me feel amazing to know that i helped him, and if i ever see him again i will deffinately do everything i can to get him off of the streets and some where safe.
-x-Rose-x-
When we were on vacation in Hawaii there were many homeless people everywhere. Everyday for the first week we would see the same couple people sleeping on the benches, showering in the outside showers, and pushing shopping carts with their life belongs all packed in tight. These people did not even really ask for money. Sometimes they would ask for 25 cents to buy something small, but they never begged. So many times we gave them money, trusting they were using it for good purposes. Which we knew they were because we would see them go into a restaurant and come out with food. I agree with some of these comments above about many of these people using us, but I think we also need to have some faith in people because we never know how their life became as bad as it did.