The Things Women Can Get Away With

I was at work the other day when "Before He Cheats" by Carrie Underwood came on the radio.

I know the song's been on the radio for about two years now, but I never really thought of it in a sociopolitical context before that night.

I'm not sure about the IP restrictions for posting song lyrics, so I'm only posting the chorus. The full lyrics can be viewed here.

I dug my key into the side
of his pretty little souped-up 4-wheel drive,
Carved my name into his leather seats
I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights
Slashed a hole in all 4 tires
Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats

When you read the lyrics or listen to the song, what words might you use to describe this girl? Here's a list I came up with:

-Justified
-Righteous
-Assertive

But think, for a moment, how radically your perception of the narrator might change if co were a male. Nevermind the fact that it would probably screw up the rhyme and the meter (not that it was ever that well written of a song in the first place). What if it were the girl cheating and the guy enacting revenge? Now your list probably changes to: something like:

-Jealous
-Violent
-Obsessive
-Abusive

In the mid-seventies and early eighties, there was a movement to change the dominant perception of women as weak and submissive. It is apparent, however, that this movement has only devolved into a revolution in which women get away with act of aggression that men wouldn't because otherwise it would be oppressing the 'weaker sex'.

40 years ago, a man might very well have gotten away with that sort of behavior, perhaps even be praised for it. Now women have taken that archaic male role, as men silently wait to be chosen by women for fear that their pursuit might be construed as sexual harrassment.

If we, as a culture, want to achieve full sexual equality, we must be willing to be held responsible for our own actions, not as a man or a woman, but as a person. We must be a society that not only allows its women to act as men do, but also one which allows men to act as women do. We must be a society that doesn't determine the difference.