Recently I have just discovered how common cheating is. So many people have had their boyfriend or girlfriend cheat on them and I can't figure out why. What is it about cheating that is so appealing? Why not just break up w/ the person you're with if you're not happy with the relationship? And is it guys or girls that cheat more? I can't decide. I just would really like to know what it is about cheating that is so great. why do it and who does it most? Also, I've always had the philosophy of "once a cheater, always a cheater." Is that true or not?
Bookmark/Search this post with:
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
I've never cheated or have been cheated on, but I have friends that have been cheated on. I have seen so many of my friends cry because they were cheated on. Not to say that its mostly guys who cheat, but out of my friends who have been cheated on, I've had more girl friends that were cheated on than boy friends. I think a lot of the reason people cheat is because
1. they get bored
2. one person may want a more "sexual" relationship and the other doesn't.
I think cheating is stupid and hurtful. I agree with you completely. If you don't want to be with that person anymore, just break up instead of putting them through even more pain by cheating.
There are numerous reasons why people cheat, but few are genuine, some are, but few. The fact is, sadly some people see a relationship as nothing more than a 'safety net'. It's shallow and inconsiderate, but generally that doesn't matter to them until they become somebody else's 'safety net'.
Too many people are completely self-centred you see, they don't consider anybody's feelings but their own. They view their girl/boyfriend as garaunteed sex and support, in case they don't manage to hook up with sombody else and need sex, or in case they need a shoulder to cry their self-serving eyes out on when they feel a bit sorry for themselves. That is the 'safety net' principle.
Unfortunately the safety net is usually one sided, as the other person needs to believe they are in a relationship if the whole scheme is going to work for the user. You see, people who operate the 'safety net' principle don't like the idea of their net going walkabout. They don't want their partner sleeping around, even if they are themselves. They are usually selfish and posessive, and consumed with paranoia because they judge people by their own pitiful standards. Thus they are prone to fits of outrage if they suspect their net might be unfaithful. They assume because they are self-serving emotional vampires that everybody else is too.
This sometimes lifts when they meet somebody they actually fall for, then WHAM, welcome to the safety net bitch, how'd ya like the view from the other side? Well, how do they like it? They don't, and they generally expect hands across the world for their sorry asses. They will sit around playing the violin for themselves and denying to themselves the fact that they deserved everything they got.
When they spend so much time lying and cheating others, it's no surprise that they also lie to themselves about their cheating. They don't like to think of themselves as shallow and self-centred, largely because they know themselves they are.
_____________________________________________________________
I am the people my mother warned me about.
people either want to feel validated in the fact that they COULD get somebody else if they wanted to, or they want a break from the imperfections their partner has, OR they see something in someone else that their partner lacks. or sometimes its for the thrill of it. just for shits and giggles. sad but true.