I am a white woman (of native american and creole heritage)who recently ended a relationship with a black man for whom I cared very much because I realized that his only attraction to me was my "caucasioness." This particular individual is very successful and seems to have a very warped belief that being with a white woman is somehow a form of elevated status. He refuses to date black women, yet has no white male friends. This concept is disturbing to me, and have noticed, albeit anecdotally, that black woman/white man relationships seem to be more genuine.
What is up with this crap that black men are some how "moving up" by having relationships with white women? I have noticed that some black men I know will reject successful, acccomplished, engaging black women in favor of less than such white women (I hate to put it this way, but can we say skanky, trashy, etc.). It is no wonder that black women are bothered by this. I don't blame them.
Please post your opinions.
I used to be leftist liberal, wrote my final highschool exam in Sweden about Nazism and how it should be eliminated. I also grew up internationally. But during a summer job, an ethnically Swedish girl I was working with said how she could never get together with a blonde guy (which I am). Afew days later, I overheard at work another conversation which was on the same topic and couldnt help but butt in. I said basically how can you say that? And was met with the response from the duo (white girl, black guy) What are you racist? A damm broke in my head that day. Should add that, per capita, Sweden has an immigration rate comparative to the US. Sweden and the US are different, obviously, but still similar. I hate that country now and am on the verge of abandoning everything that I used to believe in. I am presupposing that my comments will be dismissed. But something is wrong with the world. Ideological doctrines are composed by academics while the rest of us live in a reality that doesnt exist in books and what it comes down to is not anything on a simplistic scale of good and evil. What I am talking about and what you wrote is I think the result of a political wave in the world exercising its cause and effect. My best friend while living in Greece came from Ghana and I remember being chased out of a arcade hall because we were not wanted. Its funny how your article begins with I am a white woman and is about how you cannot understand the behaviour of your ex boyfriend who happens to be black. Again, I am presupposing that you will shrug off my comments but anyway...
though this is true i think that some black women do also have that misconception when dating a white man.
Love GOD!Love Yourself! and Love Others!
I think as long as the relationship is based on mutual love and respect then there will never be an issue. But race is a barrier between a lot of relationships, people just don't want that added stress. But brave people, genuine people, don't care about race but the woman. I hope next time, no matter if the guy is white, black, asian, or latino, you find a guy that loves you, not your race.
~ I trust my soul, my only goal is just to be! ~
RENT
It takes time,
Interracial relationships are not all that easy because of many reasons.
Sexual preferences, social, familial and cultural pressure are few of the elements that are not always easy to handle when engaging into a interracial relationship.
Since interracial relationships are quite new in the evolution we are part off, those relations are being tackled in many ways because of prejudice and negative assumptions that are kept alive by frustrated individuals in our societies.
People need to understand that it should be accepted that people like or dislike the idea of engaging into a interracial relationship and therefore should not take it personal if one claims to feel no attraction to someone of another race.
Attraction has many faces and are bound to one’s personality.
Time will fade all negative issues that surround interracial relationships.
I read your blog and it was very sad due to the fact that your ex dated you due to your skin being lighter. I'm in the legal profession so you have to have a diverse amount of friends. I would not want anyone to feel that way about black women. I've been married to a white woman for 20 years and it had nothing to do with me not loving my black women or the color of her skin. I've dated many of different nationalities so that had no bearing on my decision to marry or date another race. I do find a lot of my black friends who are women don't down me for my marriage but they do ask me was there any bad reasoning behind the choice. I feel that God placed us together and that's that. I'm glad you found this out now rather than later.
This reminded me of a time last year when I went to a dance club with some friends. We left after a black female came up to me and told me to get my "skanky white ass" out of the club because I was apparently only there to take the good "dark meat". I know this isn't typically, but that is what this reminded me off. I personally didn't dance with any guys that night and found it uncalled for. It really is disappointing that racial issues are still so prominent, and the issue isn't one-sided. Both sides keep the gap open.
Think about it...
http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/tomorrowtoday
I feel you on this one. I think if both sides learn that it's not you, it's your heart that brings you close to that person in your life, no matter what color the skin. Now I've had the looks from both sides. But it's worse when that person keeps it in and then continue to go behind your back and still call yourself a friend. You know this person very well, b/c they are in your face everyday...smiling...I don't think there will ever be a day when the world will say..."They look great together and mean it."