Do you know someone that is a teen parent? If you do then you know how hard it is to be a teen parent especially a teen mom. Some teens drop out of school because they have no one to care for their child while they attend school. This means that they won't have a college education and of course not even a high school diploma. So they become not only a statistic for teen pregnancy but a statistic for umemployment. Teens are truly not ready to be parents because of all the responsibilities. Being a teen parent also takes away your childhood. Many teens aren't educated about abstinence and safe sex and when a teen gets pregnant, its too late. Also, many teens aren't ready to be parents because they can barely take care of themselves. I'm not trying to hold anything against teen parents but I'm very sure that they weren't ready for parenthood. You have to be responsible and mature to be a parent and you must be able to give up some of the things that you enjoy doing to raise a child. In my opinion, teens shoud wait to have sex not only because of the risk of pregnancy but the risk of an STD. But if they do have sex, they need to pratice safe sex by using birth control. So is a teenager ready for parenthood? The answer is a definite NO. They should enjoy being a teen and wait until they are older to become parents. By using abstinence, teens will be able to graduate from high school and go to college. This will be the best decision that they have ever made and this will be also go for their future children because a child needs someone who will be able to take care of them at all times and not temporarily. Teens have their whole life to have sex so they should really consider waiting. Remember being a parent is a BIG responsibility. You NEED to be ready for parenthood and this is a true statement.
Also: If you are a teen parent and you can't handle the responsibility of raising a child, you should consider giving your child up for adoption. There are many couples that cannot conceive and they would do almost anything to have a child. You could bring that happiness to them, the happiness that only a child could bring. Think adoption not abortion.
Graduated high school and college, with honors. With little help from her parents, and for periods of time, from my father as well. I'm not saying it's a good idea at all because things were never easy, but not everyone becomes a statistic. Don't stereotype or assume that just because a girl has a child she is going to be a failure. While my mother wasn't ready for the experience, she struggled and eventually it paid off. She's stronger and a better person because of her experience of having me so young. They aren't all statistics.
Also, not that I condone teen pregnancies, but there is something to be said for the bond that I have with both of my parents. I firmly believe that our bond is due largely to our closeness in age as none of my friends with older parents have the same connection. I don't regret what my parents did and I believe they would tell you they don't regret it either-not just because they ended up with me and now they love me and everything, but because it made them stronger and better.
Also! I would have appreciated your end line much more if it said simply "Consider adoption." As the saying goes "You catch more flies with honey than vinegar." In my opinion, stating flat-out "not abortion" sounds judgmental and I think people with differing views are more likely to consider your argument if you use words and phrases that are inclusive rather than exclusive or dividing.
Interesting blog to read, despite my views differing with yours slightly.
I guess I was a lot like your mother. I did all of the things she did, and didn't have parents to help me either. There are many good daycares, and even 24-hour daycares that are more than happy to help any mother out-especially in order to get an education. most states even have programs that will help you pay for daycare as long as you are working, and everyone can claim a tax deduction. The problem isnt necessarily age, it's motivation. Teens aren't suddenly ready to be parents on their 20th birthday, the day they graduate high school or college, or any other milestone. They are ready to be parents when they can sacrifice personal time and luxuries in order to improve themselves and their children, as myself and eweyerhu's mother was. Almost anyone in the US who says they 'cannot" finish high school or college because of their children is only looking for an excuse.
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Teen pregnancy is a very complex issue, it is more than telling teens not to have sex. We are a selfish society that lives in the moment and does not associate consequences with our actions no matter how educated we are on the subject (people still start smoking don't they...)
As for adoption, children of teens/single parents do not get adopted as easily as children who have been orphaned...That whole Juno situation where someone with an unwanted pregnancy can just find an affluent caring family to pass the child off to at birth is very unlikely. Parents who cannot conceive and are using surrogates usually prefer to select the candidate before conception.
In my experience, babies get adopted much faster than children who have been orphaned. Generally by the time kids are walking and talking, by the time they've been really molded or shaped by their environment at all, they're likely to stay in the foster care system until their 18th birthday.
The Juno situation is much more common, because in that situation the family wasn't looking for a surrogate, they were looking to adopt an unwanted child. My aunt and uncle, who tried to have a child of their own for more than four years, created a book with pictures of themselves and our family, introducing themselves as future parents, why they would be good parents and how they plan to raise their children [religion, ideals etc] and they sent it to various adoption agencies. These agencies then have a collection of books they show to women who come in wanting to find a family for their unborn child.
Like I said though, that's just my experience.
One of my best friends from middle school. She moved to RI when we were in 9th grade but we all kept in touch. In high school her mom had another kid, and made her leave school to take care of her sister so the mom could work. My friend ended up getting pregnant, giving birth the day before my high school graduation.
Things are looking up; my godson is adorable and my friend has since gotten her GED, but her situation growing up definitely influenced what happened to her and how she made her decisions.
Hug a musician, they never get to dance.
I Whole Heartedly AGREE! My mom had me at seventeen and now she lives in a dumpy trailer park and works as a maid in an inn cleaning toilets. She is a drug attic and an alchoholic. She is headed for hell. I did not want to end up like her so I am in college gaining a good life for myself.
First of all, I am sorry that you had to live through all that. I do have sympathy for you, even though I'm about to make some critical remarks. As for your mother, did she end up in this situation only because of you, as a direct result of having a child at 17? Could she have made some sacrifices, taken some student loans, worked two jobs, or otherwise improved herself to avoid the situation? Could she have enrolled in a free night GED class, which usually welcomes kids? Could she have saved the drug money up to pay for a college class here and there, and slowly earned her degree? IAlso, would she have made different choices if she would have had you at age 25 instead, or would she still be an alcoholic druggie? The point here is that age is only a number, it's maturity that matters.
cheers.,
http://progressiveu.org/blog/leslieq
Check it out...it's a work in progress.
I do agree that in most cases, teens are not mature enough to have children, and therefore should seriously reconsider having sex due to the potential consequences. It is sad that these adolescence are surrounded by a world that sex is cool and does not result in the potential responsibility of a child. If we want teen pregnancies to go down, more needs to be done in our society, such as toning down sex content and lust in the media, and increasing better preventative measures to our youth.
Yea that's funny because usually birth control is 99% effective and condoms are 99% effective... maybe that's why you got pregnant. You need to get the facts right. No offense.
I got pregnant twice while i was a teenager, and despite what the stigma of being a teen mom is, I DID use protection. Go to any condom website, or read any box it'll tell you condoms are only 80% something effective, and birth control 90 something%. You can be smart and a teen mom. I can't say I agree with you, but I can't say I don't either. Teens will have sex. All might not, but a good chunk do. I think what teens should be taught there is NO SAFE/SMART SEX except not to have sex, which is what I'll be teaching mine when they are that age. But I think "safe sex" should not be taught.
MommaTrish - mom of 2 boys and a bump
Abstinence is great and all, but what happens when your kids decide to have sex and don't know how to be safe? You had sex, took precautions, and still got pregnant. What happens when your kids have sex and don't take precautions?
F*** Religion. Read more here:
http://www.progressiveu.org/020528-f-religion
I am a teen parent. Though I do believe that I should have waited, I dont regret it a bit because I love my son and am trying my hardest to give him the life that he deserves since God saw me fit to be blessed with him. I will be a freshmen in College this year, and I know it will be hard to work, raise my son, and go to school.... but he is worth it. I know God wouldn't have put anything on my shoulders that I could not handle. And a lot of teen mothers dont get much help from their parents simply because they are disappointed or whatever the excuse. But now their are many organizations that will help teen parents and I think that they should become more educated about these organizations in their community because they really are a big help. Another thing, you're right when you say some aren't even educated about abstinence and so forth. Girls as young as 12 years old are getting pregnant these days and sex education isn't forced in school. I think that it should be a requirement. Some dont even have the oppertunity to have a class on sex ed. until high school, so when you're 12 year's old, even though you still know that their are consequences to your actions, you have to wonder could it have been prevented if only someone would have talked to her. I know a girl who is 14 and has 2 kids of her own. Her oldest is almost 3. Another reason why cases like hers keep ocurring in my opinion is because the parent sometimes may take control. So she doesn't really actually realize how hard it is to raise a child so she never really learned from the first time.
It ain't easy being a teen parent, but I give credit to whoever didn't have an abortion due to pressure. I am not a teen parent by I happen to love children and babysit alot. I practically raised my sister at 2 months old at the age of 12. I know there is a lot of work to be done. A child needs 24/hr attention to grow healthy. I also know that if you really think about what you are doing and don't let your self get carried away in moments, you can prevent pregnancies.
You can be thinking about what you are doing and not getting carried away in a moment and still become pregnant. All birth control methods can fail.
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I totally agree with teens not being ready for parenthood.
But not every teen becomes a statistic. I know I'm not.
I graduated high school early,...Although I could've went to school after I graduated I didn't..I wanted to take care of my baby first until he could talk!
And now this fall I'll be a freshman in college. Not a vocational or trade school..but a local community college..then of course an university. And no I'm not taking the short route like most young mothers do and try to do nursing.
I'm actually gonna pursue my dream of becoming an English teacher.
Anyways,
I had to put my 2 cent in to tell you NOT EVERY TEEN IS A STATISTIC!!!
*Smiles*
Bye!!
Laughter Is Healthy For You ~ Do It Everyday!
I wouldn't call nursing the short route, nor do I agree that most young mothers pursue nursing as a career. Nursing school requires rotations in locations and at times that aren't up to the student, and some of the courses are difficult. Any college degree is an accomplishment, no matter what field it is in.
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