Suicide

I knew a guy once who found comfort in sliding a silver machete down his arms to show how tormented he felt inside. Every day he would show up to school with a new incision right next to the previous one, and he would try to hide it with the sleeves of his overly-baggy sweatshirt. He had notebooks full of stories and poetry invovling subjects of the widest categories. He rarely washed the hair that had bottles of gel within it and clung to his head. Now this young man was attractive, and when his rare smile brightened his face there was a chance for anyone paying attention to see the lighter side of his troubled soul. He wore silver spikes around his wrists which earned him the nickname "spike" among my family. He also carried numerous knives around his thin waiste. I used to try to convince him that there was no reason to harm himself, and that his death would benefit no-one. Eventually Spike faded out of my life, but I still heard of him periodically. Once I heard that he brought brass knuckles to a school dance and punched a girl accross the face. I also heard that he should have been sent to jail several times, but every time he got away with it. What I don't understand is that if someone wants to kill themself it should prove extremely simple. So why would you illustrate your morbid thoughts on your arms where a knife so carefully stripped away pieces of white/grey flesh? What would bring someone like this to hate their lives so much more than everyone else?