Setting Realistic and Effective Goals

We all can relate to the fact that when we say we'll do something, it doesn't always get done. Or worse, we end up in a more frustrating situation than when we started. Why does it seem so impossible to set realistic goals? Well, as human beings we are naturally driven to do what we want to do in life, but lack the motivation to do that which we think is either a waste of time or will take too long to do. Here are some pointers for setting and achieving the goals that are important to you...

-First of all, ask yourself the reason you are setting a goal. If your goal is to buy a bigger house than your parents' had, then you need to reassess what is truly important to you. A competition between family members solves nothing. If your goal, however, is to lose weight because you feel self-concious of your overly round stomach, then kudos to you. Your reasoning would be to become healthier, more physically fit, and have a better self-image.

- Secondly, if you write a goal down and place it where you can see it or have easy access to it, it becomes more realistic and solid.

- Also, you must believe that your goal is actually possible or you will have absolutely no motivation to try at all. Remember that goals do not have to be super challenging. If you mix one challenging goal with a few easier ones, the challenging goal will seem less stressful because it is coupled with ones that you accomplish more easily.

- You MUST have a specific deadline to reach your goal and a means of motivation or else the goal could sit untouched while you procrastinate. There was a TV commercial for a light, fat-free yogurt that I saw the other day. The lady would eat the yogurt while walking past her bikini for the next summer. I know that's a cheesy example, but the bikini served as her means of motivation because she hung it on the wall where she would see it every time she walked past. Since she would wear the swimsuit in the summer, the start of summer became her deadline for losing weight to look good in her bikini. I know that's a cheesy example, but it effectively displays the important factors in this step of goal-setting.

- I know I just said that goals must have a deadline, but what about the ones that you must consistantly work to reach (such as living a more faith-filled life or being kinder to the people around you)? With these goals, you should also write them down, but put the written copies in more than one place, such as on your desk, taped to the wall by your bed, or on a small piece of paper in your wallet or purse. These serve as constant reminders to live out your goal wherever you go.

- Prioritize your goals not by asking yourself "Which is more important?" but instead by asking "Which am I going to focus on right now?" All goals that you set are obviously important or you wouldn't bother to set them as goals, so asking which is more important doesn't accomplish much. Choosing which to currently focus on allows you to prioritize what you need to do NOW. Take deadlines and the difficulty of your goals into consideration when you do this. Remember that even though one goal MAY actually be more important than another, that is not what you should focus on. Your prioritizing should be set on what you can do right now to take a step closer to reaching that goal, not simply reaching the goal itself.

- Break big parts of the same goal down into steps. This not only helps you to prioritize what you should do right now to reach your goal, but also makes the task seem easier.

- Get your friends and family involved in your goal. Let them be the encouraging factor while you work towards your accomplishment. They work well as reminders.

- Lastly, don't forget to tune out negative feelings and discouraging comments from others. Discouragement should not stop you from continuing towards your goal. If you do get discouraged, think about whether or not your goal was truly attainable. If it wasn't, set another, smaller goal with a deadline or break the big one into more steps. If it was achievable, reassess what you did prior to getting discouraged. You might find you missed a step in your preparation so that you lacked motivation or reasoning.

And if you remember nothing else, remember this: Failure in the end does not exist unless you had failure while on the journey.