I’ve found the perfect solution to combating rising gas prices!
Electricity? Corn? Soy? Algae? Hydrogen?
No, no, no, and no. With my solution, you can still continue using the traditional gasoline product we’ve all come to know and love.
The solution is simple.
Take a cordless drill. Find a newish model car (preferably one higher up, like an SUV or a pick up). Place yourself underneath it, find the plastic fuel tank (older cars will still have metal tanks), drill a little hole, and help yourself to some free gasoline!
The days of messy siphoning are over, and no longer do you need to worry about those pesky locking gas caps!
I can’t take all the credit for this brilliant plan. The idea came from my brother this morning, when he called me to say he’d be late picking up his kid because he had to have his gas tank replaced. Someone drilled a hole in it. Of course his car alarm never went off. You know that only happens when it isn’t actually needed.
He called the police and was given the response of, “there’s nothing we can do.” It’s true. They really can’t do anything about it.
With his insurance deductible at the amount it is, it wasn’t even worth filing a claim. He gnashed his teeth for a bit and then shelled out money he didn’t really have to replace it.
His apartment complex is gated, except for one broken gate that continues to not get fixed. His complex, in the pretty brochure, boasts of security patrolling the lots all day and night—my brother’s never seen them. Maybe he has a slim chance of getting the complex to pay for it but, chances are, it was another resident—probably the owner of the I-have-a-tiny-penis-syndrome truck that parks next to him.
So, sorry to say, your wallets may suffer even more than you realize from rising gas prices. Now you just might have to worry about shelling out a few hundred dollars every few weeks to replace the tank holding that gas you just bought.
Don’t get your hopes up that this is an isolated incident, either. Auto repair shops across the nation have been reporting recent spikes in fuel tank replacements. My brother was lucky the repair shop he chose had the part needed in stock.
Unfortunately, the only things you can really do to prevent this are those common sense ideas that never work. Park your car in well-lit areas. Park your car where more people are likely to be present.
Parking in a garage is actually a good option, but not one available to many people—like my brother. He’s got his very own reserved, covered space, but that’s it.
Really, I guess, just keep an eye on your car and hope for the best. Maybe hire some snipers if you feel the need.
Just be aware that some people are desperate, selfish, thieving asshats.
You might be the next victim.
Now you are going and giving people ideas! I am getting pissed at the high food prices. Pretty soon we will be eating ramen noodles. Hell those might have even gone up. Thanks for bringing this article to light. It sucks to hear about this but it is good to hear about it. I wonder how we could fix this. Maybe tape some automatic mace to the gas tank..when someone gets near it it sprays them in the eyes. Maybe I should invent automatic gas tank mace. hmmm.
http://www.progressiveu.org/032913-lupus-uncureable-wait-what
Love comments? I do too!
I just got tired of hearing the same complaints about gas prices over and over again. I decided to put in a
legitimateoriginal one. ;-)Automatic mace sounds like an awesome idea! Just be sure you can turn the automatic part on or off somehow. You don't want to blind your mechanic!
Read my Blogs!
This is Why I'm Hot
And My Other Blogs
I kept getting my bike stolen back in high school. Then it stopped getting stolen, but someone kept taking the chain off of it and leaving it there, just sitting there, not on the gears anymore, which would make me have to put it back on the bike every day after school.
I told my parents about an idea that I had: Put some kind of acid or extreme skin irritant on the chain so when someone touches it, they'll scream in pain. They told me not to.
I should have done it.
I love it automatic gas mace!!!
We could double plate our fuel tanks and in the intermidiate space could be fill with skunk juice... hows that for an alarm?
Looks like now I am going to switch to how I use to do the gas fill up when I was completely broke... five to Ten dollars at a time that way I wont be out a hundred and twenty dollars worth of gas...all they will get is fumes. Wait, That will be alot of stops in the Silverado... Damn were is my bike!
~T
All truths are easy to understand once discovered; The point is to discover them ~Galileo
You might be out of gas completely by time they get done with your gas tank if you only put in 5 dollars or 10 bucks! Then you would be really screwed.
http://www.progressiveu.org/032913-lupus-uncureable-wait-what
Love comments? I do too!
That is Okay.... I have a drill and a smart five year old that can get beneth small cars....
:))
All truths are easy to understand once discovered; The point is to discover them ~Galileo
you know, another suggestion on the "article" I found said you could get a bumper sticker that says, "My fuel tank is empty" and hope the people planning to drill a hole are smart enough to read and stupid enough to believe it. ;-)
What's sad is, it would probably work. I should have listed it in my blog. :-P
Read my Blogs!
This is Why I'm Hot
And My Other Blogs
oh it isn't just the $120 in gas you'd be out...
I believe my brother told me it was a little over $800 to replace the fuel tank. :-/
Read my Blogs!
This is Why I'm Hot
And My Other Blogs
true... the fullness of the tank would be the sucker punch...icing on the cake... insult to injury.
If there were only one gallon of gas in the tank the joke would be on the ass munch... or that is how my mind would play it to feel better.
~T
All truths are easy to understand once discovered; The point is to discover them ~Galileo
He got ripped off! I replaced my fuel tank last year for about $450.
I was so thinking about a double tank before I saw your reply! I thought about onion juice, but skunk juice is better.
Find out everything you need to know about poop here:
http://progressiveu.org/000701-everything-you-need-know-about-poop
I had to rate this post a 5 for 2 reasons.
1. I love the Metallica song that you quoted in your title. I can hear the lead singer's grunting in my head.
2. You used the word asshat. I know this word is an insult, but I cannnot help but laugh anytime I see or hear it used. It might possibly be my favorite putdown of all time.
In all seriousness though, I'm really glad I can park in a garage, well for now at least. I'm a bit fearful of what might happen to my car when I move to Pittsburgh to start grad school in the fall though....
"Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent." - Victor Hugo
Yup, I'm a music nerd.
I don't know about Pittsburgh, but at ASU the difference between lot parking and structure parking was about $200 a semester. :-/ And on game days, unless you lived on campus, you couldn't use your parking pass to park.
I had on campus parking when I lived in the dorms, but after I moved off-campus my car stayed at home and I biked to school. Until my bike got stolen. During the day with 2 locks on it. Then I started taking the bus. ;-)
Campus parking is insane. If you are able, I would recommend not parking on campus. A lot of theft goes on in university parking areas.
Read my Blogs!
This is Why I'm Hot
And My Other Blogs
That's how ours is here, too- insane! We don't have a different price for covered or uncovered. I think our parking is cheap at around $200 for fall and spring. I think they won't even let people that live on campus park on game days without the extra $10.00 here.
Find out everything you need to know about poop here:
http://progressiveu.org/000701-everything-you-need-know-about-poop
I goin' out with my drill and gas can tonight!!! I'm gonna scrounge me up 5 gallons!
I know this must have been EXTREMELY frustrating for your brother, but you must admit, whoever did that wasn't ALL dumb. When gas prices get over $5/gallon you can bet people are going to be stealing gas whenever they get a chance. Maybe they'll start selling indestructible gas tanks that won't let drills in....it would be a nice product to market....
I am SO glad I have a garage!
It probably seems like a semi-brilliant idea. But, really, it's Las Vegas. It's not some small town an hour or more away from a decent-sized city. There's public transportation here and it goes all over. There's really not any excuse for vandalizing someone's property and stealing gas here.
If someone is desperate enough for gas that they have to resort to stealing it, then they're not above taking the bus with all of us common folk who are able to deal with increasing gas prices honestly.
Indestructible gas tanks would be an awesome product. :-) But what would it be made out of?
I'll have a garage once I move, but I think my fuel tank is metal anyway, so it doesn't matter. ;-)
Read my Blogs!
This is Why I'm Hot
And My Other Blogs
What is bulletproof glass made out of - maybe they could use aluminium oxynitride.....
My guess is, with public transportation so readily available, they probably did it just to SAY that they did it. You know how important it is to keep up that street cred.
*puts away cordless drill* Oh, you were kidding?
Just kidding, of course I wouldn't go ripping off your gas tanks. I only steal priceless designer jewelery. Okaaaay, maybe not that either.
This is getting to be a problem again since the gas prices and economy are so unstable. What can you do? I guess the only solution is to get those neato security measures installed on cars in some country (I think it was Africa) where flames shoot up from under the car and prevent theives from getting close. Now that's a stylish way to protect your car.
~ *~
This is a signature, an automated thingy that pops up when I comment, not a demand to see my blog!
Mind Control is Easier Than You Think
That sounds like such a cool, James Bond thing to do to your car!
I don't think it would look too good with my '89 Honda Accord, though. :-/ Maybe some lasers, or poisoned darts? Or ninjas. Ninjas look good with anything. ;-)
Read my Blogs!
This is Why I'm Hot
And My Other Blogs
Ninlas are the new black!
~ *~
This is a signature, an automated thingy that pops up when I comment, not a demand to see my blog!
Mind Control is Easier Than You Think
What if the flames are late and the crooks already have a stream of gas pouring out when the flames finally decide to appear? Bye bye car.......
Some people really are asshats. I suppose it's just one more valuable thing that some people will think they are entitled to, by whatever means necessary.
-------------------------
You must be the change you wish to see in the world -- Mahatma Ghandi
Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress. --Mahatma Gandhi
My Blog: http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/kablock
People feeling entitled to everything they desire should be shot.
You know the person who vandalized my brother's car is the same person who brings some expensive item back to a store with no receipt, or a receipt that clearly states the item cannot be returned, and continues to yell and scream and swear at employees until some manager just gives them whatever they want. Then they walk away feeling smugly superior, confident in the knowledge that they really are better than everyone else and deserve special treatment.
I really cannot stand people who feel entitled to things.
Read my Blogs!
This is Why I'm Hot
And My Other Blogs
Gah,I know how that is. I used to work at Disney World and get those kinds of people all the time who would come up to me complaining just because they knew they would get something free out of it, which they inevitably did.
One thing I did enjoy, though, was giving free things to people who didn't ask for it, like a little girl who dropped her ice cream cone, I'd give her family a coupon for a free one and they actually appreciated it.
-------------------------
You must be the change you wish to see in the world -- Mahatma Ghandi
Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress. --Mahatma Gandhi
My Blog: http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/kablock
oooh do you work in the ice cream parlor?!
How many people get absolutely pissed because they weren't randomly picked for the "year of a million dreams" sundae? :-P That thing is INSANE!
The retail place I worked at was privately owned and the owner and managers always backed up the employees. I know it's pretty rare for this to happen, but it made me feel smugly superior to let people know throwing a tantrum wasn't going to work with me. :-P
Read my Blogs!
This is Why I'm Hot
And My Other Blogs
I actually worked on Main Street as Parade Audience Control, so most of the dropped ice cream cones I saw were from people waiting for the parade to start.
The one redeeming factor of having people throw tantrums with me is that I could just wait patiently until they were done, then tell them that I couldn't do a dang thing and they had to go to City Hall and throw a tantrum there if they wanted anything. Usually I'd get those indignant looks and "You mean I just wasted five minutes?!" to which I could smile my Disney Smile (tm) and nod. :D
-------------------------
You must be the change you wish to see in the world -- Mahatma Ghandi
Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress. --Mahatma Gandhi
My Blog: http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/kablock
Well geesh it's about time someone comes up with a solution. If the prices become any higher our whole world will be poor. The prices have gotten ridiculous and it is time to find a solution. I am sorry to hear about your situation and next time you will know more ways to prevent such crimes.
I reviewed a book that has to deal with ethanol and this country. I think we should recycle our old cooking grease and buid multifuel vehicles.
I’ve found the perfect solution to combating rising gas prices!
Electricity? Corn? Soy? Algae? Hydrogen?
Published Author and Poet
Teacher Education Student.
I recycle the vegetable oil I use to turn corn tortillas into taco shells and just reuse it to make more taco shells a different day. it just seems like a waste to throw all that oil out when it doesn't actually go bad.
I'd be interested in reading that book, if it's any good. I've heard of restaurants using that idea. It sounds like a pretty neat idea. Is the book out in public yet, and what's the title?
Also, I think you mentioned in another blog that you know where to go to get authors to send you books for reviewing before they're published. Would you mind sharing that information?
Read my Blogs!
This is Why I'm Hot
And My Other Blogs