People come and go in our lives..We give...and take...and create this perfect relationship of interest..Then we start feeling closer to that person..and we dont care if we give and not take anything back anymore...
Thats the moment when the other decides to cut the "umbilical cord" that fed your relationship...because there is no more challenge..there is no more excitment in your relationship...
There is silence...and they dissapear from your life ..hurting you..
it takes time but then you decide to be strong and careful...and not allow this happen again...
But you are wrong...the same thing repeats itself many times..and you become exhausted...and confused ask your self...
Should i be cold and superficial..and not get involved emotionally in any relationship...or should i take the risk of being hurt, and go for it...love all the way, give and care...
Society is loosing its integrity every day more...
Do i subscribe to the rules and habits of this society...
Every night when i go to sleep i analyze myself..count my accomplishments and think how i can fix my mistakes...
does any one else in this world think like me? amy i the only allien in this world...
sometimes it feels great to be special...but sometimes i feel lonely...
i have learned that you are special only when the other say you are..not when you are different from them...what am i then?
I cant be superficial ..because i know when the night comes and i lay down in my dark room thinking about my accomplishments and mistake..i know i would feel ashamed of my self...for giving only half...for smiling...but not meaning..for saying i love you but not really meaning it...
If i am myself..i dont fit in this society..if i am what society wants..mysels will refuse me...
There is no warm home for my soul...I cant win i am caugth in the juxtaposition of my existence...
it is a double bind..you cant win either way...
Is that a better solution??
:-S