This is a response to a blog post by jloigman, posted earlier today. Their post is here.
While I appreciate jloigman's critique of Take Back the Night, I'm writing a defense. There are some very valid points in "Rape Is Not Progressive." Yes, it is an idealist march. Maybe it doesn't directly end rape. But that's not necessarily what TBTN is meant to do.
I am, in fact, a member of an anti-rape organization. Not only do I participate in Take Back the Night, I also coordinated my campus's Clothesline Project this year. I participate in these groups because rape infuriates me, but what breaks my heart is the silence that too many victims endure.
The point of TBTN, Clothesline, and Sexual Assault Awareness month is not to parade around, proud in pretentious feminism, blowing whistles, and screaming. It's about raising awareness and showing victims that they are NOT alone and they do NOT have to remain silent. In no other crime are victims told to be ashamed, are they told that "you must have wanted it," are they told to deal with it. Rape victims have been isolated and silenced. Events such as TBTN are an effort to end that silence.
And I believe that groups like this NEED to exist. Admittedly, I am biased. But I am biased for reasons: an incredible number of people very dear to me are victims of sexual assault or relationship violence. For them I shout, for them I write stories on t-shirts and hang them in our student union. Because some of these women believed they had no resources, no one to turn to when they were assaulted.
Take a closer look at the groups who organize TBTN or the Clothesline Project—I'm willing to bet you that that's not all they do. For instance, my group is in charge of presenting sexual assault resources and education to all incoming freshmen, and work jointly with a sexual assault hotline. Most Take Back the Night marches are organized by domestic violence shelters and human rights advocates. These people are not marching for the sake of demonstration, or to feel good about themselves—they're trying to tell the world what they care about. Do you think these people do not make a difference to those they serve?
A side note: believe it or not, these rallies run on manpower and not much else. I should know, I am treasurer for my group and we spent less than $25 on organizing both Clothesline and Take Back the Night. We get hardly any funding as it is, we do not spend it recklessly.
Sometimes you have to yell about something to get people to think about it. An overwhelming amount of people bask in the comfort of the idea that rape doesn't affect them—but the numbers show that somewhere between 1 in 3 and 1 in 6 women will be raped in their lives, as will roughly 1 in 7 men. That number is astronomically high. If each of these people believes they are alone, if each of these people hears the word rape and thinks "Kobe Bryant" or "Duke Lacrosse team", how will we ever fix the problem? I believe that we have to admit something is happening before it can be solved. So maybe yelling "People unite, take back the night, men out there, show you care" didn't stop a rape. But it did show the girl who thought she was alone that there are people out there who can help her heal, and that she has the choice to empower herself.
What exactly is the Clothesline project? It's happening on my campus soonish.
The Clothesline Project is an exhibit of t-shirts that contain stories from rape/sexual assault/domestic violence survivors, family, and friends. It has been done all over the world, often in conjunction with TBTN or Sexual Assault Awareness week. Also, some art therapy programs that work with domestic abuse shelters create such projects. It's usually displayed in a very visible place, and the goal of the project is to raise awareness about rape within a given community and to show survivors that they are not alone.
Of course, we shouldn't tolerate rape and yes we should speak out. But why is the silence even more deafening when it happens to a boy? People condemn people like Roman Polanski who slept (RAPED!!!!) a 13 year old girl. But that outrage doesn't begin to compare to Mary Kay Letourneau, who also RAPED a 13 year old boy and did so for a year. Ended up getting pregnant, going to jail and then getting out and marrying her adolescent victim. You don't get more twisted than that. But somehow it is okay for women to rape boys but not for men to rape girls. I am of the mind RAPE OF EITHER SEX IS WRONG. I think it is time men start making their voices heard and tell their stories.
I have also noticed when the topic of rape is brought up, homosexuality cannot be discussed at all. Men who rape boys are not gay they are pedophiles. Yet most pedophiles self-describe as gay. Gregory Pathiakis, 26, of Brockton raped a 15 year old boy in his class and didn't get any jail time for it. Why? Because he is gay and we cannot condemn homosexuals for their behavior, they are simply acting on their natural impulses. But we can lock a straight male up in a second. This is sickening. A person should have no effect in whether they committed a crime or not. Is this equality? What about the boy who quit his school and activities because of the shame of the attack? He is now being homeschooled (which is probably a good thing anyway, public schools by and large SUCK but that's a different topic) and has to repair his life.
Speaking out about rape is easy when it is men raping women. But what about women raping boys or gay men raping boys or even women raping girls. The Vagina Monologues has a scene that depicts lesbian rape and yet it is hailed as some woman empowering play! Excuse me when did rape of any variety become empowering!? Here is an excerpt from a n article written about a film called "She Stole My Voice." "A victim of lesbian rape faces not only the trauma of the rape itself, but completely inappropriate responses from her community. Often the community as a whole, law enforcement, and even the lesbian community deny that the crime is possible, or that it has the severity of male-female rape." Why are not more people screaming and shouting about the Vagina Monologues and other lesbian rapes? Why aren't more people repulsed by Mary Kay Letourneau? Why did Greg Pathiakis get a free pass? Why is rape only a heterosexual phenomenon and the gay community act like any sex they have is consensual and fine. Well it is not and it is time all victims, no matter who the perpetrator was, get a chance to tell these monsters that RAPE, ALL RAPE IS WRONG AND WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.
I am part of the Religious Right so that automatically makes me a homophobe in America. But even I know this is wrong yet I don't hear the liberals and the gay community saying boo about it! If I am a homophobe, then why am I the only one interested in protecting gays from rape? I don't see them having some taking back the night rally. We cannot categorize rape simply as men raping women. We need to open our eyes and see what is happening before us. Rape is an universal problem. Not a man's problem. Not a woman's ordeal. But a sickness that affects both male and females. That strikes both gay and straight and we need to hold these perps responsible for the damage they cause and stop being so politically correct. Political correctness is the death of common sense and it is costing people their lives.
Do you have any statistics to back up your claims in the second paragraph?
http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/ediblewoman
A person should have no effect in whether they committed a crime or not.
Should read:
A person's sexual preference should have no effect in whether they committed a crime or not.
I can say I am a Black woman from Los Angeles and you would ask if I have any statistics to back that up? Statistics don't mean squat. We are talking about real people here not statistics. Will you only listen if you have statistics? How can I get statistics if these people are not reporting the crimes? I didn't report my rape, so that is one less official statistic but it doesn't mean it didn't happen. I don't need statistics because I am statistic. I am a survivor. And I speak for others who don't have the instant credibility most women do have. Generally, a woman reporting a rape by a man is going to be believed. She has resources. Fear may prevent her from using them but they are there. Men don't have resources. Gays raped by their partners don't have resources. Lesbians are women so they have some but only if her perp is a man and not a woman. Then her rape becomes non-existent. You are pretty cold ediblewoman, if after listening to an impassioned speech to treat all rapists with the same equal and fervent justice, all you can say is "do you have any statistics to back up paragraph two?" I thought this was Progressive U, but I guess the rapes of gays and lesbians only mean something if I got statistics. Yeah, and I am the homophobe!
The statement for which I requested statistics was this one:
"I have also noticed when the topic of rape is brought up, homosexuality cannot be discussed at all. Men who rape boys are not gay they are pedophiles. Yet most pedophiles self-describe as gay."
A backhanded way of calling gays and lesbians perverts.
You made a damning statement about not one, but two groups of people (one of group deserves it IMHO; the other does not). If you are going to say things like "most pedophiles self-describe as gay" in a forum such as ProU, you can expect to be called upon to back it up. That is how it works here. If someone states something dubious as factual, and another user suspects it is bullshit, there is usually a request for sources or statistics (with sources) to back it up.
I've noticed that your method of backing up your dubious claims is to be insulting, which may convince some, but it won't convince the more intelligent users here. They will require some proof, which you have yet to provide in ANY comment so far (one anecdotal tale does not count as evidence for the kind of broad generalizations you regularly make about groups you hate). But please, keep ranting. It is entertaining.
Also, the reply button is very useful for maintaining the flow of the threads. Please use it.
http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/ediblewoman