Two years ago I wrote a blog about people who get married young. I was in high school, but I knew quite a few couples who were engaged and ready to get married out of high school. Now, halfway through my college career, I still think that getting married early is not a bad thing, as long as the two people involved feel it is the right time.
There were so many people talking about how those couples wouldn't make it and how stupid it would be for them to waste their lives by getting married. Well, those couples are still together and I've had even more friends get engaged and married in the past few years. I guess I still don't understand why people are against couples getting married early. If that is what they want, then what is so wrong with the idea? Most of my friends who have gotten married still go to school and live normal lives. But throughout high school, they had to deal with people breathing down their necks, telling them they would just turn into another statistic.
I personally think that as long as both individuals are sure that is what they want, and they have shown they can be responsible and devoted to one another, then it shouldn't be a problem. Now, I'm not saying that the road will be an easy one, but what marriage doesn't have issues at some point? I think the 50% divorce rate just scares people into thinking it will happen to you, so why not just date, or wait until your older to get married. Sorry, but I think that if two people are truly in love and they are ready for marriage, then why should it have to wait?
Our society has just become one of playing games in relationships and I think it's time that changes. Getting married older will not necessarily diminish the relationship dilemmas that currently exist. It takes people being devoted and honest to one another. Age should not play a factor.
Two Years Later and I Still Think Getting Married Young Isn't Bad
By Tori13 - Posted on March 24th, 2008
People are so terrified of ending up alone, especially women. I know that's not something I want for myself. I saw my Mother go through it. But that hasn't stopped me from falling in love. When My Mom was my age, she was already married, and I believe pregnant with me. I'm nowhere near ready for a child, but no doubt if my bf proposed, I 'd be on it in a heartbeat/
Hollywood is a place where they'll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul.
I know people who have married young and twenty years later are still married. If you truly believe you found your soul mate, go for it. As for me, I have already been married and divorced, so I am not too keen on trying it again. But, as some say, never say never. I may find someone else I would want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with him.
Getting married older will insure more time to get to know the person you are engaged to. I go to a small christian school and it is just hallarious to me that people that have only been dating four months get engaged. I think that waiting is the best thing to do because it prolongs children, a lot more then birth control or condoms ever could, and it gives one time to get to know the person just in case that person turns out to be a person that you would rather die then marry. My grandmother and my mother have raced into marriage and they both have been divorced. My grandmother is in a marriage now that she is really scared to get out of because she is scared of him. It also allows people to think more about studies then their spouse. Just my opinion, i'm not bashing your views.
I don't see how waiting for marriage prolongs having children. Are you thinking that it's because people won't have sex until they're married? I actually knew a couple that got married just to have sex.
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You made a great point. Love should be the deciding factor for two people deciding to get married or nto to get married, not societal pressure. If two people are really ready to get married then they should have (hopefully) discussed it thouroughly and thought about how it will affect their lives when they get married. All I can say is that when you feel that it is the right time for you, then it probably is. Keep doing what you are doing!
The key to any marriage is a foundation, and that foundation has to be God. I know some might say , we were Christians and it still did not work. I am talking about not getting the last word in, but letting the Word Of God be the last word. That is the secret formula to marriage. When me and my husband argue, I say well I just see what God has to say about that. I know you may not think that your situation is not in there but it is. We as women allways say we did everyhting we could, but sometimes doing all we could is just being humble and let the man be a man.
The key to any marriage is a foundation, and that foundation has to be God.
It is a religious myth that being religious helps a marriage to succeed. Actually, religious people are more likely to divorce than non-religious people. Approximately 27% of born-again christian marriages end in divorce. Among atheists and agnostics, that rate is only 21%. (LINK - and before anyone starts kvetching, these statistics were compiled and publicsed by The Barna Research Group, a christian marketing firm).
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A question of love.
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I agree. If the two people feel a connection then it doesn't matter when they get married. As for the divorce rate... just because they are young does not mean they are going to get divorced. Not all people agree on things but if they truly love each other they will try their best.
I can't agree with you more. I am 17 years old and engaged to be married. My mom agrees with me on my decision. I think people just judge without even thinking of it because we are still in high school and its not really the thing to do anymore. But i believe if you are in love with the other person,and you'll know it,there is absolutly nothing wrong with getting married young. It depends on the person and I think most teens who get married know what they are going to be up against. I'm so incredibly happy and I really do admire you for touching this subject because it is something that needs to be talked about.
what bad can come out of waiting?
one shouldn't rush such a life-long decision, because marriage should be life-long,
but it's okay if it isn't...sometimes it happens.
In the end what matter is that you would have liked it if you had waited and known enough about the other person to know that they are the one for you.
“You cannot wean away an addict from the drug. It is not possible for me to walk away from Ranjha. If it is our destiny to be together then who, other than God, can change it?”
she's a spaceman, no walker, dreamer...maybe
Thank you for writing this! i agree 100% i am getting married in june and i am 19. there is no reason why getting married young is bad. sure young ppl make mistakes but so do many adults. and just bc i am getting married young does not mean i wanna have kids young [i personaly wanna wait till im in my 30's to have kids] or not go to school or anything like that. The divorce rate is high no doubt, but that doesnt stop me. I think if you know the person, know why your getting married, and know what it takes and what you need from your spouse then age doesnt matter. hell i kno plenty of older ppl who got married and were so set in thier ways they could not change and be a team and it led to the divorce [and there are other reasons of course]. I am just tankful that i found the person right for me early in life :) and it comes down to that really. we found eachother early, nothing wrong with that.
What a great blog. I agree. I mean I do have doubts about some young people getting married but as long as people are communicating to each other and being honest, then nothing else should stop them from doing what they want to do. I had doubts about one couple I knew in high school. They got married 2 years ago right after high school. Now the girl is pregnant and everyone just seems so excited about having a family and being together. =)
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