No- Brainer

The No-Brainer
Hard work, in this new age, doesn’t seem to always pay off. I take that back, studious work seems to longer pay off. Have you ever noticed that we call football players, well…football players and not student-athletes? With their special privileges, padded grades and influential coaches its kind of hard to refer to these athletes as students. Football players are not required to apply themselves in the classroom, only the field and they still manage to walk away with a diploma and an over-paid job.
Our nation has become so obsessed and wrapped up in sports that the IQ level is rapidly dropping. These rich, dumb, athletes reproduce like they’re the last man on Earth and they need to save the human race, passing their intelligence, or lack-there-of, to the next generation. The student who had to work to get his or her diploma, however, is carefully planning out their future. Trying to figure out how to pay off student loans, buy a house, and set up their life before they have a child. That’s right, one, not thirteen. Subsequently, football players are leading us to Idiocracy.
To me, it is of growing concern, that our future generations will be incapable of reading the Constitution, but more concerning that it will not bother them in the least. After much thought and consideration I have developed a fool-proof plan to save our planet. After all, if this continues, we can kiss a cure to cancer goodbye. We can turn in our electronics and stop expecting new technology to arrive.
If students don’t start getting the credit and attention they deserve then they’re going to simply stop learning and they will see no point in teaching their children to learn…
We must simply force football players to learn, by taking the one thing that is distracting them out of the picture, football. They will have no choice but to gain knowledge or become a poor, failure.
If they choose the latter rather than the former then we will put their physical abilities to the test on work chains. Using them to help our nation, instead of destroy it. This will allow those who want to get an education the opportunity because those who don’t will be doing the physical labor, not throwing a pigskin. As to guarantee that they don’t skip out on work duty, we will put those, incapable of learning, in a special building. It will be guarded to ensure that they don’t get out into the population and impregnate one of our intelligent people.
However, I do not wish to become an absolute ruler, so if the “strong people” choose to not work then they can be used for medicinal experiments. This will help our race in another very important form. And to think we’ve been letting them run around on the grass tackling each other, for a living.
Football is a form of entertainment. It should be done for fun. With that said, I can see no possible counter-argument one could use against my proposal. However, I would like to note, that my boyfriend is to be excluded, as it’s not his fault the public allowed him to turn away from his studies.