About 10 years ago, I came to America from Thailand with my family. I didn't know English, so at the time, my heritage was the only thing I held close to my heart. Now, years later, I can no longer speak my language fluently nor remember everything about my culture the way I used to. I'm addicted to freedom and American life style. And the adults are starting to complain.
I love America. It's so diverse and unique in every way possible. Yet, the rest of the world still get a misconception of this country. Teenagers all over the world want to be Americanized while most parents refused it. At the same time, American cultures are spreading through out the world. The way they dress, the way they talk, the movies they watch and the music they listen to are all a part of American cultures. So, why do people still have problems with us?
It hurts me when my parents say things like, "You're turning into an American." How do they expect me not to adopt some of American cultures when I've been living here for almost half of my life? What is so wrong with being an American anyway? Sure, I moved away from my own traditions a little bit. But that doesn't mean I'm not Thai anymore.
There are kids who are worst than me though. If their parents cannot speak English well, they would be embarrassed to introduce their parents to their friends. A friend of mine once told me that her mother was her maid when a whole lot of us went to her house. I later found out the truth from her brother. I wonder how her mother would feel if she finds out. There are even people who throw their heritage away to be "pure" America. How does that work exactly?
When people ask me about my nationality, I'd tell them I'm Thai without hesitation even though it might seem like I've been Americanized. I know who I am and where I came from. I still speak Thai at home although English often slip out. I just want to be embraced by both cultures. Is that not allowed?
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Bravo, or brava for a lady (lol, politically correct). America is such a moshpit of different ideas and different cultures, and as long as you DONT say your mom is your maid, you're not becoming "less" Thai and/or "more" American.
The Thai language thing--do you not remember all the words you used to know, or just how to phrase your sentences correctly in Thai? I'm in a psychology class and we're talking about brain processes like that, lol so I'm interested.
I still understand Thai very well when someone speaks the language to me. I can speak it okay, but an American accent is attached to it. Weird, I know. lol. Sometimes I use the wrong word, or I might have to pause for a while before forming a sentence correctly. I love psychology! I'm thinking about a way to make a study about American cultures. Brain processes? With language? How does that work exactly?
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http://www.mylot.com/?ref=truelife
wait a minute, I'm just in an intro class, lol, and i'm a freshman so I basically know nothing. One potential theory is that when you learn something, your brain changes and it's always there--even if you can't always go "back" into your brain and get it.
I think some people associate America with having too much freedom because a lot of people say "It's a free country." Yes, that's true. But some people say it to justify their wrongdoings, or to justify everything they do, or to just use that as a point to all of their arguments.
Or they associate America with what they see in the tabloids, thinking that every American "drinks it all in" and lives the lifestyle that they see on the tabloids.
You know reading your blog I learned something knew. I never really realized how comng to American can really change a person. I am glad to hear that you have adjusted very well to America! I can understand how difficult it can be to adjust to a new life style and all.
Wow I just wrote a blog very similar to this one. I completely understand although I am not Thai I am Sierra Leonean and I also sometimes feel as though I am not allowed to embrace both aspects of myself.I think that all that matters is that you know who you are where your from and where you are.There is nothing wrong with embracing both aspects of yourself.
http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/speakonitsista
It sounds like the American people have done a decent job of embracing you. We are fairly tolerant of differences as long as you make the effort to assimilate. It seems like the main place you are catching grief is in your home.
If you were truly Americanized you would learn what most American kids have known for the last several generations. Now and again parents need to be told to blow it out their butt! Perhaps to a lessor degree but still significant, American kids rebel against American culture and their parents about every generation. America of 2000 is completely different culturally from America of 1950. It is the kids that define the new culture. You are doing the same thing.
I'd start by getting seriously in their face about why they brought you to America if they didn't want you to be American? Ask them why if they want to be Thai they just don't go home to Thailand? Make sure that they understand that they are asking you to embrace a culture which might have a nice language a good cusine and some fine traditions and customs all of which you value but which is decidedly inferior to the American culture which you have embraced. The proof of that is that they had to leave Thailand to find opportunity for themselves and their children.
Make sure they understand that you and you alone will make the decisions about which parts of Thai culture you will honor and which parts you will discard in favor of American culture. Tell them that you are determined to succeed in America and to a very large degree, these means thinking and behaving like an American. And make sure that they understand that you plan to raise your children as Americans and that they as grandparents will have no say in the matter and that you might even marry an American who is of other than Thai ethnicity. Tell them that they had better damn well get used to it and it was up to them to change and fit into the country where they chose to raise you.
Make sure they understand that from your perspective it is they who are the problem and not you.
Once you have made it clear to them that these are your decisions and they have no say in the matter than you can reach accomodation based on mutual respect. It is part of growing up. Don't expect it to be easy or all get straightened out in one conversation. It is a process and at times a painful process.