My body: 34C, 24, 37, I'm 5'6, fine featured, with clear, porcelain white skin, and dark brown eyes and hair. I'd say I'm pretty attractive. Yet my modesty in dress causes my appearance to be ignored by the opposite sex; they'd rather talk to the less attractive girl in the mini skirt.
The book, "Unhooked: How Young Women Pursue Sex, Delay Love and Lose at Both", by Laura Sessions Stepp explains in great depth the recent cultural development of hookups. A hookup is defined as "any kind of physical affection from kissing to sex with no commitment or obligation attached". Today, it seems they are everywhere. There are girls who sleep with a different guy every weekend, and never speak to those men ever again, and this is regarded as normal. Whatever happened to self respect? Whatever happened to dating, and waiting, and romance? Even just a few months ago an acquaintance of mine came up to me and straight up asked for sex. He didn't try to win my heart first, or even try to become a better friend. All he wanted was some action. After I said no, he's hardly spoken to me since. It's as if I lose sex appeal because I'm not willing to degrade myself.
Secondly, take a look at what the people on television wear. To compete with the models and actresses, us ordinary girls would practically have to walk around in bikini's all the time. And what about that whole "if you've got it flaunt it" culture that has developed in the last few decades. Whatever happened to leaving room for the imagination? I go to the mall and I see middle school girls wearing pants so tight you could see a dime in their back pockets. I feel like we've killed modesty so much that when a girl can't flirt with the way she dresses anymore. There used to be a day where if you unbuttoned your shirt just one button extra, it was sexy...kind of erotic. Suggestive. But today, since women wear low cut shirts all the time anyways, it seems, if you unbuttoned your shirt that extra button, no one would notice or care. Last Halloween a group of girls at my school wore essentially nothing but strips of cloth covering those areas that are illegal to display in public. They just wore it. What's there for a girl to keep in her secret arsenal of seduction when all the riches and spoils of a girls body have already been exposed. Guys have no motivation anymore to woo. (The restaurant business will suffer greatly when the practice of wining and dining has finally gone extinct :P )
Lastly, is nothing held sacred? I hear all this mumbo jumbo about people having threesomes with complete strangers like its no big deal. It's unbelievable. A part of me wants to think its all talk...and to be honest it might be...but I don't go around following people with a polygraph to see if they are telling the truth about their sex lives, so I wouldn't know. Oh and have I mentioned anal sex? I've been asked by people, "So have you ever tried it?" "Nope" "WHAT?! Are you serious? Aren't you curious" As if that's something everyone does and everyone wants to do. There are some people who are more traditional, not to mention some people who keep bedroom habits private. Yet there is always that one girl who brags about what she does to get attention.
Men and Women of the world, I say we need a change. Lets go back to the days of chivalry and modesty. I'm all for feminism and women's right to choose, but there is a line that must be drawn and upheld. When does a liberated woman become a vagina with legs, breasts and a face? Women, you need to treat yourselves with respect, after all you are sentient beings not sex toys. Don't let sexy die! Lets hide our girls a little bit so that when we do decide to show a little more skin, it's sexy, not just normal. Keep sexy alive.
**Constructive Criticism is welcome! Thank you!**
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I'm right there in the boat with you.
I have a nice figure, I'm not going into details here, and I am fairly attractive. And yet... I never get noticed because I prefer to wear clothes that fit me. Heck, I feel immoral when my skirts show my mid thigh, and yet I see girls walking around with skirts the length of my hand. And I have pretty small hands. I feel uncomfortable wearing bathing suits in public because they are usually so revealing compared to what I normally wear. And that's not to say that I don't have my fair share of fashionable, figure complementing outfits. And nary a glance comes my way. It may be my nature to be as unobtrusive as possible, but not even one? I am not ugly, and I do not hide in corners. I just prefer not to be the center of attention. And I know it is because I dress modestly, because when I do wear a skirt that's a little too short or a shirt that's a little too tight, I do turn heads.
And to be honest, I don't mind all that much. I'd prefer to be physically noticed after getting to know someone. I'd rather have a mental/emotional connection than a physical one.
Women need to realize that being desired based solely on their physical appearance really isn't that great of a compliment. Furthermore, it's a damn shame that these days "hooking up" is considered normal behavior. It's degrading to both parties, and frankly, it's disgusting when you have sex with a person who's name you've probably barely memorized let alone feel comfortable enough to ask them questions about their sexual history. You don't know where they've been! Lol.
I consider myself fairly attractive too, but I never really had anyone interested in me until my current boyfriend - and we got to know each other as people first for 5 months before we started dating. Now I don't care if anyone looks or not ^_^.
Good blog!