I have older siblings, so I know how things were after they turned 18...not much different from when they were 17. So that's basically what I thought would happen after I turned 18 at the beginning of the year. Man was i wrong.
I mean things didn't change at first I just felt like a teenager living at home...the routine. But now things are completely different. I first noticed how things had changed last week when I asked if I could stay at my sister's and not to school the next day b/c I just didn't feel like it. I thought for sure they would say no (b/c I'd missed school the week before for the same reason) but they calmly responded with "You're 18 now and you know what you're capable of at school. If you don't want to go then don't." I was shocked but I was like wow, that's pretty awesome.
Then, a few days later I brought up the prospect of my boyfriend coming to stay with us for a few days in July. I figured my step-mom would okay it after conferring with my dad and asking a bit more about him since they don't know him too well. But her only condition was that the house get cleaned first.
So today I took another chance at gaining my freedom. I brought up the fact that my boyfriend wanted me to go to a conference in Chicago with him this summer. I was kind of expecting them to ask what for who would I be staying with...you know all those things. But the only condition was that I tell them how much money I need ahead of time. Wow! I'm thoroughly surprised at all this freedom. And to be quite honest I'm not sure how to handle it.
But I'm glad it's like this b/c I know that I'm being allowed to make my own decisions and mistakes...but at a time when my parents are still there to step in if I need them.
I have the best parents ever.
Never in a Million Years...
By vern - Posted on April 13th, 2008



LUCKY! I'm a tad jealous to say the least. Nothing has changed for me since I turned 18, I might even say I'm on a shorter leash than I was. Silly parents, but I love them :)
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Dream is destiny [Waking Life]
I'm sorry...that sucks...I don't understand why parents don't ease their kids into the responsibilities of making decisions for themselves that comes with adulthood
but yeah I love mine too no matter what they do
I think if you're living under their roof free of charge, nothing should change. Maybe your curfew... but I'm a firm believer in their house, their rules.
I get so annoyed when my parents don't ground my little brother and confine him to his room until his homework is done. "He's 18..." so what?! He's in high school, he pays no bills but his cell phone and his gas, and he's getting bad grades. MAKE him do his homework.
He can choose to do as he wishes when he's out of the house. Being 18 doesn't change anything in my mind.
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You are the Voice of the Childwen of the Revowution! [Toulouse, Moulin Rouge]
well I still follow their rules...and do chores...and get good grades...and I respect their rules too which is why I asked for all of the things mentioned in the blog even though I could've taken the "I'm an adult" attitude...I like that I have more freedom now b/c I'm not being thrown out into the adult world with no parental guidance...instead I'm learning with their guidance
Good to hear.
I was the same way... I got freedom, but I earned it.
Most kids nowadays expect that freedom as SOON as they turn 18 (or earlier in many cases... how sad) regardless of whether or not they behave. I suppose they don't realize that without their parents they'd be... uh... not so well off.
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You are the Voice of the Childwen of the Revowution! [Toulouse, Moulin Rouge]
oh definitely...without my parents I would be lost...I would've seriously screwed up my life a long time ago...I think it's dumb that kids expect this freedom...when I lived with my mom I had absolutely no supervision...and let me tell you that it wasn't all it's cracked up to be...I wanted discipline in my life...and I think I still need it at times which is why I'm glad I'm in the situation I'm in
Yep, i agree. If you've proven yourself studious, active and thinking, it seems like the leash ought be extended (if it hasn't already). It's a cause and effect gig.
Every organism's heartbeat holds a universe of beauty at http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/green-underbelly
totally...and when you do get those freedoms it's great...b/c I didn't expect any of those situations to be so easy...especially the last one...but I respect them and I know that they respect me too
Groovy, make it a point to visit THE BEAN. It'll give you that freedom feeling... without the afterthought.
Every organism's heartbeat holds a universe of beauty at http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/green-underbelly
wait what?
You know, infamous art exhibit in downtown Chicago...?
Every organism's heartbeat holds a universe of beauty at http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/green-underbelly
ummm no I didn't know...but now I do...I don't if I'll have time what with the conference and all...but I'll try
Groovy. Tell me this wouldn't be worth a half an hour..
http://static.flickr.com/43/95888541_ae682ae9ff.jpg
Every organism's heartbeat holds a universe of beauty at http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/green-underbelly
haha yeah...I'll tell my boyfriend and see if we can make time
I feel like I've proven myself, but honestly I don't mind a shorter leash :] I maintain my gpa and rank, and I've been accepted to college already, so I mean, if i can't go out as much as my friends, that just means i get to finish more of this craziness that is the last semester of senior year. I'll get to do what I want LATER, and I'm learning some critical time management :D
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Dream is destiny [Waking Life]
yeah I mean I never really go out with friends and when I do it's all friends from my team...so I don't really do much...but now that I have the freedoms...and an amazing boyfriend I'm glad I don't have that shorter leash...but it's not like I'm free to do whatever I want...if you have proven yourself maybe your parents realize it and respect it but just aren't quite comfortable letting you go yet. I know my dad had trouble with it but my step-mom convinced him otherwise
I think that's it. One time I got into it with my mom and I yelled that I wasn't a little girl anymore (cliche i knowwww) and she blew a fuse :D I did not expect that this was the issue all along. She's afraid of letting me go (I'm the oldest) but it took me a really long time to realize that. Plus, ODD TREND, she's disliked every guy I've dated EVER for really arbitrary reasons. Just know that you're lucky to have support for maintaining a love life.
HOPE YOU HAVE FUN AT THE BEAN!
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Dream is destiny [Waking Life]
yeah my dad had a hard time at first...I'm the oldest too...but he's having an even harder time with my sister and brother...I'm sure you'll get the respect from them one day...actually I'm sure you have it now but it's just not evident...and as for the love life deal...yeah they don't mind...but they've never met him...he lives like 700 miles away...so I even barely get to see him...I hope they like him
and thanks
my mom was the same, except this happened when I turned 19. At 18 I wasn't really ready for freedom. At first I thought it was kind of weird, but I realized that my mom was just letting me grow up.
“I hope the departure is joyful and I hope never to return.” - Frida Kahlo
"I'm the Map, I'm the Map, I'm the Map, I'm the Map" - The Map
I wish my mom would've been like that but of course not
I always thought trust was a delicate thing. Your parents are going about it is a great way! I hope I can remember this when people ask me for advice on what to do. (I know I'll never have kids of my own.) I'm so happy that you get to make your own mistakes. I hope you continue to grow!
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You can't ignore me, for I'll not lie down quietly.
http://insanitek.net
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