Another multiracial blog. I'm going to be using a quote from one of the members who made a comment about "Multiracial families."
"I think that multi racial children are SO beautiful, because they seem to take the best of both races."
This kind of quote is really something that can break self-esteems. It's like my previous post about the Eurasian Beauty Myth. What if you had some kind of standards -- that you are "SUPPOSED" to be beautiful and that you are "SUPPOSED" to have the "best" of both races?
What if you weren't considered beautiful by standards? Would this mean that someone didn't have the "best" of both races?
If someone wasn't good at math, or studying, or didn't get the grades, would this mean that the person is the defunct of one of the races? [These are stereotypes of Asians.]
How about if a person didn't have beautiful blonde hair, or pretty blue eyes? Would this person be a defunct of the Europeans?
Sometimes, people need to watch what and how they word things. This may be an over-generalisation of mixed people, but I believe that mixed people are more likely to have self esteem issues due to the possibility of being tied to different cultures... and the fact that there is an invisible standard that we have to hold up.
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I mean, I confess that I used to think that way about bi-racial children, and I never thought there might be a flip-side to it.
But I can relate about the Asians and math thing. I never, ever, EVER was good at math. Now that in college I actually study I'm decent at it. But all through high school, walking around, I felt like there was something inherently wrong with me because I didn't have an A-average, and cuz of the math thing.
You could be right about the self-esteem issue but I don't think it has to do with being tied to two different cultures.
I think it has more to do with the set of STANDARDS that those culture places on them. In bi-racial children it would be three diferent sets of standards. The two cultures' and then the world's.
But there are sometimes taboos and cultural items that are different in both cultures, which then make for confusion, then it piles on. I'm just speaking from some of my personal experiences from talking with other mixies as well, haha.
That's an interesting concept though. What would some world standards be?
Maybe my multiracial classmates are weird...but they have very high ego. People find them to be very pretty and fascinating. One of my Asian friend is considering marrying an African American guy so their child can come out beautiful. Another Asian friend wants a Caucasian man so they can also have pretty baby. lol I just sat there with my mouth opened. Wow...looks must really be important for their child huh?
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I don't know what to say about the high ego, LOL, but the marrying just to have a pretty baby is really sad. Genes doesn't always work out the way that people want them to. I remember reading about how an African-American / European-American couple got together, wanted a lighter skinned baby... but got a darker skinned one!
I wonder if their parents would love them less if they weren't beautiful?
I think good parents will love their kids no matter what. I just find it really amusing that some people believe they can control how their children would look like or act like by combining their genes with a partner who has characteristics they would like in their kids. lol Maybe it's possible? But in the end, their children are the ones who ultimately decide what to do with their lives.
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I think that the self esteem issue among bi-racial children comes more from opposing cultural demands from their parents. If one parent considers education more important than anything while the other places family dedication extremely high, the child is stuck trying to balance these two things (which is often very hard to do) and is constantly living in the fear of letting their parents down.
I agree. I get tired of explaining the color of my skin.
I couldn't imagine selecting a life partner based off of race! I would much rather set standards like educational level, income, or even style of clothing than race.
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