Today I'd like to share with you a Buddhist story.
The Buddha was sitting with his students when a man approached him. "I need help," he said, "I have a good farm and a nice house, but sometimes I don't have enough to sell at market. I have a wonderful wife, but sometimes I wonder if she really loves me. I have two good kids, but sometimes they don't listen to me. What should I do to solve these problems?"
The Buddha shook his head and told the man, "I can't help you with any of those problems. We all have 83 problems in our lives and we always will have 83 problems. We can work very hard and, we might be able to solve one of them, but another will take its place. The only thing I can help you with is the 84th problem: wanting to be free of problems." (1)
In the story, there is no account of how the man reacted to this news, but this story really speaks to me. We ARE going to have problems, lots of them, all the time and there is no way that we can get rid of those problems. Should we worry about them? Should we constantly seek a way to fix them? Should we suffer through them in hopes that we'll eventually be rewarded?
Buddhism says that the answer to all of these question is no. Live in the moment. Accept what life brings your way and respond to it with a kind and loving heart and you'll be happy. Know that you are one with everything and everything is within you and these problems won't seem so difficult to bear any more. It makes sense to me. Why move through life with your mind always in the next moment, the next hour, the next day or year when you can enjoy the moment you're in when you're in it?
When I first started practicing and trying out these tenets, I thought it would be pretty easy to get started, but I was wrong. Staying in the moment, being aware of what you're doing and saying and thinking when you're doing and saying and thinking it is very hard. I never realized how little I was in the moment until I tried to be there.
Of course, this is only one aspect of Buddhist practice, but really, it's the most important one to me. If you're not in the moment, and not aware of what you do as it happens, then trying to practice things like right thought and lovingkindness becomes a cycle of regret, which is not what Buddhism is about.
(1) Summarized from the book "Buddhism Plain and Simple" by Steve Hagen
I had once read all I could about Buddhism thinking it would make sense to me. However, I found that sometimes I needed to try to make my life more than what it was. You see, I have a perfect example from the last week.
The school I was to work at wanted me to pay for the airfare, new work visa and hotel rooms to go back to America, renew my visa, and come back to China to be a teacher. They wanted me to do this at the last minute with no warning. Well, I couldn't. You see, we were told that the school would pay for all this stuff, so there was no need to save money. Thus, I sent my money back to America to pay the bill collectors that have been after me for the years that I was a poor student.
So, my choice was to roll over and take this? No, I didn't think so. I could afford this cost that they wanted me to bear at the last minute. So, I began looking for other jobs that would employ me at a high cost this summer so I could afford to go back to America, renew my visa, and all that stuff. It turns out because I didn't follow the tenents of Buddhism of accepting things, I have the possibility of a better job, more pay (which will still go back to America to pay off the myriad of bill collectors for my past mistakes), and I'll be teaching at a better school than the original one.
While most would take this as I spited my first school, I don't. I'm rather apathetic now considering that I found a way out of my predicament. They will continue to go on, just like they had before, things will be fine for them. I'm not worried about my own future and how I can pay for the necessities in life after I put forth the work to actually make things happen.
I agree with you and Buddha when it is said we will always have problems. I don't think the solution is to accept them if we don't have to. I just don't think there is a reason to hate those that would cause the problems in the first place.
And, I can truly say living in the moment is hard. I've been training to do it since I was a child just starting martial arts. All I can say to you there is "I wish you the best of luck!"
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You can't ignore me, for I'll not lie down quietly.
http://insanitek.net
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I've never thought or been taught that Buddhism says that you shouldn't fix something that's gone wrong in your life. In the story, the man is complaining about things he CAN'T change, such as whether or not the crops grow. Because he relies on his attachment to those worldly things for his happiness, when things go wrong that he can't fix, he suffers. However, Buddhists have always been activists, working to solve problems all over the world, so I highly doubt that any true Buddhist would have told you simply to accept that situation.
Necertheless, I'm sure that when you went to the new school there were other problems that arose from that decision that were unavoidable. By following Buddhist teachings and accepting that no situation is perfect and happiness comes from the self, Buddhism might have made you a more peaceful person. Who knows? I'm not trying to convert anyone here, just explaining.
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Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress. --Mahatma Gandhi
My Blog: http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/kablock
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Rest in peace
yourfuneralguy
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the folks are the best behaved.