sometimes i sit in my room and just think. think abut verything from why the stars organize in the way they do to why my parents at the way they do to who i am. sometimes i become overly emotional and depressed and think life sucks and why my life isnt like the lies of others. why aren't i aloud to stay out as late as my friends, why my parents are so strick, why there are so many rules...
then there are the days like this weekend in which i classify my like as me being lucky for what i have. for the people in it, and for how things go in general. see i have a lot of friends who come from what some would call a "dysfunctional family". but what exactly is a dysfunctional family?
"A dysfunctional family is a family in which conflict, misbehavior and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur continually, leading other members to accommodate such actions. Children sometimes grow up in such families with the understanding that such an arrangement is normal. Dysfunctional families are most often a result of the alcoholism, substance abuse, or other addictions of parents, parents' untreated mental illnesses/defects or personality disorders, or the parents emulating their own dysfunctional parents and dysfunctional family experiences. Violence and verbal abuse are typical outcomes."
i sometimes continplate how can someone console people on what they know nothing about. my parents have never laid a hand on me, although i sometimes get yelled at its nothing close to what i would classify as abuse. see i cant go to one of my friends and be like i understand, because i believe you can never fully understand until you've been in that persons shoes. In SC their were 16, 898 reports of child abuse or neglect (this number is estimated to be three times higher making it closer to 50,694). Thats just n south carolina, and they are rated the 46th in the overall well being of a child. thats upseting.
see last nigh alone one of my friend brothers was beaten up by their father and another friends mother was verbally abused. last week one of my friends dad threw an iron at her. ones dad is never in the pcture and her mom suffers from mental disorders. so many of them have alcoholic family members...
see i cant even imagine what it would be like to go through that every day. to come home and worry about what might happen. im blessed for not having to go through that first hand, but seeing that stuff happen and not being able to stop it, hurts. i migght not personally be able to stop it but i can be there for them when they need me. i might not fully understand but sometimes you dont always have to.
i hope to everyone who is in a spot like me keeps by their friends. see suicide is the third leading cause of death for 15- to 24-year-olds and the sixth leading cause of death for 5- to 14-year-olds. you could be a lifesaver and not even know it.
if being their isnt enough then here is some thing you might wanna keep handy. (1-800-422-4453) - thats the national child abuse number.
You sound like you have an idea of empathy. That's a good start. You care. That's a lot. Never pretend to understand what someone else is going through in situations like this, just be there for them. Just let them know they can talk to you. Never give sympathy or pity, but if you can, empathy.
You don't really need to have gone through abuse to be good friend.
-Sonja :)