Right now I guess you could say that life is alright for me, except for some parts.
I have this problem of getting mad at almost everything my boyfriend does, and he doesn't ever do anything bad. For some reason I am ALWAYS getting mad at the little things like him playing games too much. I have never been this way in my life and I don't understand what's happening to me. I've never been with someone this long and it's a great feeling, but I am afraid that I am going to mess this up if I keep getting mad about such stupid things. I feel like he shouldn't have to handle all of this but he does and I love him dearly for it. I feel extremly bad for what I do, it's almost an everyday thing where were argue, and I know that arguing is normal, but it might eventually end up causing us to break up, and that is one thing i CANNOT deal with. (again)
That leads me to talk about where I've been hurt before. I've had my heart broken once in my life and it lasted for almost 2.5 years. It was terrible. I've never felt that way before in my life. I couldn't trust the guy that broke my heart, even though him and I have been friends for about 5 years before that. He completly took my heart and smashed it, in lamest terms. He left me feeling like I just wanted to die because I could not handle the pain. He would always lie to me and lead me on. I was so in love with him, and that opened me up to be hurt and he took that change and hurt me. It was horrible, I never talk about it anymore. It ended about a year ago. Thank God.
The reason I brought that up is because I was thinking that maybe I am this way with my boyfriend because of how my friend treated years ago. I feel like maybe I am afraid to lose my bf and get hurt again. But I really need to change how I am in order to be happy and to keep this love in my heart.
If you have any advice, it would be GREATLY appreciated. I just need to know how I can control getting mad at everything.
Thanks for reading.
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Changing yourself isn't easy; it requires a lot of vigilance. But it's definitely possible--the best, cold and hard method I know is to always be conscious. Pay attention to why you feel a certain way, think about what you have an impulse to do or say, ask why you want to do that, what your motives are, why you feel the way that triggers the impulse--that sort of thing.
A lot of the time, your impulse, once observed, just won't make sense. If it doesn't have a logical basis, there's no point or justification for it--so just drop it. Logic your problems to death. If you actually feel you have a really good reason, then that's where some working out needs to happen between the both of you.
You only gave one example for why you get mad at him, so I really can't understand where exactly your anger would come from. I hope that helps, though.
thanks for commenting me. its hard to know what exactly i have to do.
i get mad at him for things like, him playing games all the time, him texting people, and like real dumb stuff like that. stuff that doesnt even seem very important =[
Well i may not know a whole lot about relationships.. but i do know one thing. Communication is extremely important in a relationship. Tell him how you feel and ask him to help you with your problems. instead of getting angry all the time.. look at it in a different light and don't allow yourself to feel that way. Theres always something to get mad at if we let it. but you have control over your emotions, your emotions don't have control over you. Try to remember that next time he does something thats aggravating to you. God Bless.~Trisha~