So I recently started dating a guy from my college (I am also a male). He is my first boyfriend and I've noticed that he doesn't like to hold hands or anything like that in public. I wasn't exactly sure why until we recently went to a concert and people were staring at us and giving us dirty looks for just holding hands.
We don't go out there and try to make out in public or anything like that. Yet, when we just held hands I heard negative comments and some people were staring at us.
Then of course we got the typical football jock type guys who decided to go out of their way to make it an issue. I feel that this is a bit out of control. If you are at a concert and just holding hands with someone, I dont see how that should ruin anyone else's experience. I mean, the lights are low, and there's a band that you came to see on stage. Was there really a need for them to approach us or make negative comments? If you came for the concert, then watch the concert.
I have been to several concerts where straight couples were making out and practically having dry sex. I was fine with them kissing, but the humping crossed the line. STILL I didn't say anything to them.
Why do people have to go out of their way to try to ruin my night or judge/voice their opinion to me when I am minding my own business and just holding my boyfriend's hand?
Public displays of affection like hand holding are totally benign and shouldn't bother anyone. I think the kind of people that go out of their way to bother you for holding hands have some major issues. Keep doing what you feel is right and set a good example for other people.
Common sense is as rare as genius. ~Emerson
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
They are doing it to make you feel bad. Stop paying attention to them and they will stop
DISCLAIMER: I am not being rude. I'm stating my opinion. No personal attacks are meant. Please give some leniency on how you take my words. imagine me saying them with a smile. ^__^
Unfortunately if these people feel they have the right to judge and influence your behavior by hassling you about it they might take it to a more violent level if they get the chance.
Be careful.
"Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much."
Oscar Wilde
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
People do it because they are afraid of that which they don't know.
DISCLAIMER: I am not being rude. I'm stating my opinion. No personal attacks are meant. Please give some leniency on how you take my words. imagine me saying them with a smile. ^__^
Fear combined with repressed homoeroticism has led to some rather hideous crimes of violence occasionaly, and a little beat down quite often.
"Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much."
Oscar Wilde
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
In America?
DISCLAIMER: I am not being rude. I'm stating my opinion. No personal attacks are meant. Please give some leniency on how you take my words. imagine me saying them with a smile. ^__^
Just a theory, but those jocks probably had some deep seeded sexual desires to have sex with men so they took their fear and frustration out on you. They don't know how to deal with their own insecurities about their own sexuality, so they messed with you and your boyfriend. I say be proud of who you are and who you're with no matter the opposition. Love is a wonderful thing and something that the people who judge other's for having a certain kind of love could do with more of.
I have never failed. I have successfully discovered 10,000 ideas that don't work.
-Thomas Edison
This kind of idiotic discrimination infuriates me- when I was dating my girlfriend, we typically liked to hold hands, put our arms around each other, etc- normal couple activities, that, when I did such (and worse) with my boyfriends, no one gave it a second glance. We got looks of disgust and horror. Meanwhile, a guy and a girl were playing tonsil-hockey and no one cared. I always wanted to tell the opposite-sex couple that I thought their relationship was "disgusting", that their life-style choice was wrong, and ask them how dare they put on such an ungodly display in a public place. But I'm just a horrible person like that.
I hope things get better soon; be careful, some people are violent idiots.
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
What's tonsil hockey? you mean french kissing?
DISCLAIMER: I am not being rude. I'm stating my opinion. No personal attacks are meant. Please give some leniency on how you take my words. imagine me saying them with a smile. ^__^
Tonsil-hockey is the term I use for when it's beyond french-kissing-- ya know, when it seems like they're trying to suck out each others' souls.
http://www.progressiveu.org/090204-dont-miss-this-chance
Oh, like in the movies! Yeah, they look like they are eating each other.
DISCLAIMER: I am not being rude. I'm stating my opinion. No personal attacks are meant. Please give some leniency on how you take my words. imagine me saying them with a smile. ^__^
HAHAHA. Oh man. I lol'd, so hard. Sooo hard. Man. Can I use that line? That's awesome.
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Ironically, people think I'm being sarcastic or witty when I say my eyes glazed over.
http://www.progressiveu.com/blog/scyze
I see that double standard all the time.
I`m also a male with a male, and he`s a very affectionate person whether we`re at home watching TV together or out somewhere else. We hold hands a lot, but there are situations and parts of town where we have to think about our safety in a way that heterosexual couples don`t. Meanwhile I see mixed sex couples swallowing tongues on the bus stop bench.
I think it`s great that you`re fine with being yourself despite some idiots who make comments. Just be careful to know when you may be in the presence of some really dangerous idiots. For example, there are certain streets where I would hold hands with my guy in the daytime but not at night when the drunks are out.
When we went to Mexico City, we expected that we would have to put on heterosexual airs to be safe, but we were staying by the Zona Rosa area, and we soon felt very comfortable there and started to notice how gay friendly it was.
When we travel, I`m very conscious of things heterosexuals wouldn`t have to think about. I have no interest into going to a homophobic country like Jamaica or Uganda when I could go somewhere where same sex couples are welcome, like Copenhagen or Montreal or Barcelona. I don`t want to have to look over my shoulder and wonder if I`m safe just because I did something so innocuous as grabbing the hand of the guy I love.