I'm not trying to say i have the worst life in the world.
I've grown up with my parents, two brothers and a sister and i love them dearly. On the other hand my parents do drugs, and they pick drugs over clothes and other needed items. My sister is quite spoiled and gets away with everything.
Then there is me. I'm 17 and I'm gay. I had a hard childhood, but i made it through it. I was molested by two different men, and raped by two other different men. This might have something to do with me being gay.
I'm consider the biggest geek in my school and on top of all that i get beat up for being gay, because I live in a town where they are very religious. I have to live a double life to be who I am. Just last weekend I was deowned by the people I love the most.
I also have seisures, which makes life a little bit better...........NOT!
I do worry about eveyone and that is just who I am but in my life I get cursed for this action.
Most problems come with the subject of me being lesbian, but have it alot better than most. This has been making me question everything i have even known. Such as religion. Am I going to hell for being gay? Most say yes but what is the true answer. Another is Am I really gay at all? or am i just stupid?
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I don't know. In ancient Rome, you know you were only gay if you were the recipient. Prominent political public figures had gay lovers. What of them. It's the fear we are all going to become gay and fail to procreate. Someday, fear will be shown to be a little man behind a curtain pulling all the triggers. Oh Dorothy, there is no place like home
Your not stupid I believe it is normal to question all these things. If you are questioning being gay maybe you are not. But what has been done to you is very awful and I am sorry for that. No one should go through that. Like you stated the reason you may be gay is because of the fact that wrong stuff was done to you. If i were you I would stay kind of open minded and as you get older you will hopefully know which way you want to go. I think there is not right and wrong between being gay or being straight.The "true" answer whether you are going to hell or heaven no one can answer regardless of what they say and try to use to back it up. Only god knows that answer. I wouldn't change yourself though because everyone wants you to. You change who you are because YOU want to change. It really is sad about your situtation at home. But all of this right now at your age will make you stronger in the long run.
Yeah I would say you have the worst life in the world!