Is marriage dead?

Some people still believe that marriage is sacred and should be a commitment shared between a man and a woman in love. However, the question still stands; is modern day marriage dead or dying? In order to justify whether or not marriage in today’s society really is dead we first need to define the word “marriage”. The Encarta English Dictionary defines marriage as, “a legally recognized relationship, established by a civil or religious ceremony, between two people who intend to live together as sexual and domestic partners”. As an establishment itself, marriage is evolving over time in order to provide rights for everyone, yet it continues to decline when concerning the principals of commitment. Gay men and women are now gaining marriage rights in specific areas of certain countries because by law the government cannot discriminate against sexual orientation. Many couples are getting married for the wrong reasons perhaps to gain marriage benefits for active duty military, or because unwed couples are expecting an unexpected baby, and quite possibly for other reasons such as money. Or what about those who have been living with the same person for several years (7+) and have children? Should common law marriage mean the same as traditional marriages? Marriage isn’t dead, but the value of marriage is deteriorating fast.

In certain countries, gay men and women are gaining marriage rights. “Same-sex marriage is now legal in Massachusetts, Ontario and the Netherlands… for the first time in Western history” (Public, 2007). Several of the presidential candidates for 2008 have shown their discontent with same sex marriages. Mitt Romney stated that “marriage should be limited to the union of a man and a woman” (Luo, 2007). Many religious groups view homosexuality as a sin, thus same sex marriage morally wrong. Same sex marriages weaken the meaning and value of marriage as an institution.

Another way marriage is weakening in meaning and value is by couples getting married for the wrong reasons. Several active duty military personnel are getting married to gain marriage benefits for when they are deployed overseas. Many young couples get married as a result of unprotected sex, leading to an unexpected child. The value of marriage has changed for many. It should always be for the reason of love, and not for the reasons mentioned above.

For many, the value of marriage has changed from “till death do us part” to that of “till divorce do us part”. Marriage shouldn’t be seen as something easily fixable with divorce. 3.6 per 1,000 population get divorced (NCHS, 2006). The increasing divorce rates cause the legitimacy of marriage to decline. It is also a binding agreement between a man and a woman; getting divorced is like breaking a promise. So many people take advantage of marriage because they view it as easily fixable, and thus the value of it seems to wear off.
Does the common law marriage take something away from the legal aspect of marriage if anyone could be considered married if they had been living with the same person for many years? In some American states if a man and a woman are living together for more than five years they gain all of the legal benefits of being married just without the ceremony. Should this really be so? If anyone can be living with the same person for more than five years, then what is the point of marriage? This is another reason the meaning of marriage is dying. Now many people don’t have to get married to gain all of the marriage benefits. What should marriage really stand for? If it really is a legal binding between a man and a woman, then how is it that unmarried couples are allowed the same benefits as married couples?

In conclusion, marriage isn’t dead, yet there are just some aspects of marriage that seem to be dying. The meaning of marriage now has changed to suit everyone, homosexuals and heterosexuals alike. The value of marriage seems to be diminishing by men and women getting married for the wrong reasons such as, military benefits or if a child has come into the picture. Marriage is also seen as something that is easily fixed by divorce so more people take advantage of it. Marriage has changed. The traditional views about getting married for love have all now changed for other reasons. Some people don’t even get married and still have all the same benefits as married couples. The common law marriage brings down the value of getting married; anyone now can be seen as legally married by a common law. The end result is that marriage isn’t what it was 20 years ago. The meaning of it has gradually been dying throughout the years.

Enlighten me with your thoughts on this matter.

Luo, M. (September 8, 2007). Romney’s Tone on Gay Rights Is Seen as Shift. The New York Times. Retrieved September 9, 2007, from http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/08/us/politics/08romney.html?em&ex=118939...

National Center for Health Statistics. (2006). Marriage and Divorce. Monitoring the Nation’s Health. Retrieved September 9, 2007, from http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/divorce.htm.

Public Agenda. (2007). Gay Rights: Overview. Public Agenda. Retrieved September 09, 2007, from http://www.publicagenda.org/issues/overview.cfm?issue_type=gay_rights.