So you met someone really fun and nice over your summer vacation. You become really good friends and have a great time hanging out. Then you both go home- trading contact information and promising to keep in touch, of course.
The first couple of weeks or months its easy to keep writing and talking to each other. Then, your letters, emails and messages begin to go unanswered. Do you have the right to feel hurt?
I personally think that it is rude to do something like this. It has happened to me several times. Granted, I understand that life gets busy and complicated and writing or calling can be a problem. But if you say, "Let's keep in touch", an effort on both sides is implied. I always warn people that it can take a while for me to respond- I don't usually have a set schedule, making it hard to consistently email, phone or write letters. But I at least do what I can. I try to treat my friends like my family, spending as much time writing and calling as I can for both. Has this ever happened to anyone else, or am I just that hard to get along with? How did you deal with it?
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is yes say "let's keep in touch" then i write a note to myself to write them in a week. a week is long enough for things to have transpired, for the message to be interesting if it isn't on the phone or IM. also, if nothing really has happened in said week then i wait another, if nothing happens in that week also then i write them anyways. i give them my thoughts and feelings on what has happened thusfar and i wait patiently for their reply. my grandfather always said "if it is important it can truly wait." and most people that i take the time to stay in contact with are important to me. so i hold off. i try not to burn themselves or myself out on contacting them.
Yours truly,
.demosthenes
Thank you for the advice. I'm not trying to have a pity party or anything, I just was sick of writing and not getting a reply and had to rant about it somewhere.
My friend describes me as flighty. I don't call, I don't write, and I am too busy to hang out. When I do find time to reunite with old friends, it's like we never parted. My main reason is just because I'm really busy, and when I have time to spare I would rather spend it with myself or my family. I truly care about all of my friends, old and new, and if they were to call me at 3am in need of something I would be there in a heartbeat. I think of them all the time. I don't think the person doesn't care, they may just be in a complex situation that is directing their attention elsewhere. You'll probably see this happening more as you get older, because your friends are having families of their own, careers, and their own sanity to deal with.
F*** Religion. Read more here:
http://www.progressiveu.org/020528-f-religion