At the moment, I'm surfing this site, and trying to think of something profound to write about. But, really, it's just one of those days. Today, I don't even want to do the miniscule amount of work that I have to do. I love my work, I have no issues with it, but I just want everything handed to me today. I"m very proud of myself for being independent, taking care of myself, working hard, all that, but today, I'd love to be at home, having my mother support me. Now is there anything wrong with that?
Sometimes I think my laziness is because I ggrew up too fast. I was always too eager to take on an adult role, to leave my time as a kid behind, but now, I find myself wishing I could just be a lazy, spoiled kid. Life would be easier, I could worry less about life problems and everything profound, and being responsible...but I know that wouldn't be satisfying, or at least that's what I'm supposed to think, since that's not really an option. I wonder if maybe there should be a better transition in place for us all to move from being high school kids to adults, so that we wouldn't spend so much time looking ahead, and then looking back. What happened to the present? It never seems to be enough. It's like I pine for the past, and justify the present by saying how good the future will be. I was living, I could hav ebeen living, I will be living. But am I living?
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
I feel the exact same way. You want to grow up, long to be taken seriously, and then one day you wake up and realize that you didn't let yourself be a kid when you were supose to be a kid. Part of me blames our society and the pressure it places on achieving sucess. You have to start out early to be sucessful they tell us. If you want to get into college you better start preparing in the 9th grade, if you want things in life you have to work for it. Yeah thats true, but should your "happiest time of life" be the sacrificial lamb. It's a never ending chain reaction leading to unhappiness. It can't just be a personal thing, too many of my old classmates are feeling the same way. Everyday I ask myself the same question... Am I really living my life? The answer is still No.