Very high on my list of annoyances is to be told, “Bless you,” or worse, “God bless you” after sneezing. I am embarrassed for those who say it to me. “Bless me?” I think. “You don’t even know me!” But usually I don’t say this unless I am in an especially foul or sardonic mood. It has strained my resources of politeness to invent a response that is tactful and at the same time retains my integrity. Often I say, “Please don’t bless me” or “No blessings, please.” Sometimes I don’t say anything and the blesser acquires an odd, expectant look as he or she awaits my customary “Thank you,” which I refuse to supply.
There are a few competing theories as to the origin of this phrase, but the leading idea stems from the late 500s at the start of the European bubonic plague. Sneezing was seen as a sign of impending illness (which is strange, because I sneeze far more often during health than during sickness). Pope Gregory I is said to have issued a mandate that a sneezer must be blessed so as to prevent acquisition of the plague. Presumably, the plague was associated with infestation of the devil and a blessing was sufficient to act as a sort of preventative exorcism. (It’s too bad controlled scientific experiments weren’t performed to test the efficacy of that!)
Here we are, more than fifteen hundred years later, and many people don’t think twice before blessing a perfect stranger. It’s astounding! What’s more is that the blessing is not a premeditated bestowal of good will or godliness; it is a spontaneous, habitual phrase that people bark out following any sneeze. It strikes me as so bizarre that when sneezes come in trios, so come the blessings: Sneeze! Bless you. Sneeze! Bless you. Sneeze! Bless you. Thank you. On more than one occasion I have heard the blesser say “Bless you,” so quietly that the sneezer could not possibly have heard. This is a sign of the blesser being conscious enough of the possibility of the sneezer not wanting a blessing, but nonetheless feeling as though the blessing must be given in order either to bless the sneezer without his or her knowing, or just to feel normal. Furthermore, I have heard sneezers bless themselves, which is fine by me…that’s none of my business. Still it makes me shrug my shoulders.
The main reason that I am so opposed to being blessed is that it insults me. (By the way, I would like to be clear that it does not offend me, because I do not feel as though I can be offended by someone whom I do not respect.) It insults me because I am not a Christian – I am not even a theist (I’m not an atheist, either, in the strictest sense, but that’s another story), so the fact that someone can presume to bless me after sneezing strikes me as audacious and pitifully ignorant.
Sneezing, after all, is a rather typical bodily function that surely serves a genuine biological purpose, and very few if any of us can truthfully claim to be immune to sneezes. I am not entirely against needless and trivial customary sayings, but if we’re going to use them, let’s be consistent, for goodness sake! The “generalization approach” would have us say “Bless you” after coughing, burping, stomach rumbling, farting, or nose blowing. “Excuse you,” passes for a few of these, but is ultimately condescending and is intended to guide the person toward the tendency to say “Excuse me” after doing the thing, or toward not doing it all (yeah – hold it in!).
But more generally, I think saying anything at all to the performer of such normal occurrences is ridiculous. Many languages have their version of “Bless you” that is not steeped in the Christian tradition, or the lineage of any religion. Spanish speakers, for instance, say “Salud,” and German speakers say “Gesundheit,” both of which translate into English as “health” and bear no religious connotation. But this, too, is silly because it glosses over the fact that sneezes rarely imply poor health, and it fails to generalize to other bodily functions.
It would be much more to my liking if people just accepted the biological fact that everybody sneezes, coughs, farts, rumbles their stomach, and blows their nose (well, not everyone blows their nose, but those who don’t at least shoot boogers and snot out of a nostril once in a while). I can agree to a polite response to farting being something along the lines of, “I apologize to you good gentlemen, who now must inhale the gaseous fume that has resulted from my earlier ingestion of an especially tasty burrito, and I hope you will not hold my internal odors too strongly in my disfavor.” But, alas, I think the day that becomes customary will not be seen in my lifetime, lest I surround myself with jocular and altogether exotic company.
Bless you.
Honestly, lighten up haha.
It's just a cultural saying.
I really enjoyed this. I found it funny, and truthful at the same time. I have found that I say "Blesh you", haha it never comes out "bless you".
I sneeze MANY times when I do sneeze (at least 4 or 5 at a time), I absolutely HATE it when people say "Bless you" in the middle of one of these fits. It makes me sound like there IS a demon coming out of my body because I feel the need to say, "Thank You", but it always gets caught in the middle of another sneeze. The people that know me, wait until I am done, then generally offer a polite, "bless you", and I appriciate it. Not even the fact that they said it, but the fact that they waited. Lol
At one point, I never said "bless you", but I began reading about witches, and (Supossedly) they said "Bless you" after a sneeze EVERY time, so I then adopted that. Now, I use "Bless you" (or really the tone of voice I use to say it) to convey my level of annoyedness at the person who sneezed.
(EX: If they sneezed without covering their mouths I give them a verbal F You hidden in a "bless you", haha) Have you ever heard of Dane Cook? He's a comedian, and although I generally ignore most of his jokes, one fits perfectly here. He talks about a guy sneezing right in his face, and he told him, "Bless you", to which the man replied, "i don't believe in God...when I die I will become one with nature"....long story short, Dane said he thought it would be funny if when he dies he turns into a tree, and some lumberjack cuts him down and prints the bible on him. Haha, funny even if you ARE religious. ANYWAY: Now that I'm off topic, I'll call it quits.
~In order to have a better society, we need to CREATE a better society."
i have heard that when you sneeze your heart accually skips a beat or something like that. Anyway, someone saying bless you after you sneeze in nothing more than someone who wants to be nice. its not incinuating that you are Christian.
Christians arent the only people who recieve blessings. Blessings, as a word, is not even religious. to recieve a blessing, is to recieve good tiding. when something good happens to you consider it a blessing, meaning that you were not alone in affecting the outcome.
I have heard to that it is like a hiccup for your heart or something along those lines, so then people were afraid your heart was stopping, so they blessed you.
And also, I really don't like when people ASK me to say it. I hate that, it is my choice. who says I have to bless anybody? Just my little pet peeve about the whole sneezing etiquette.
I agree to the fullest extent over the topic of sneezing. All of my comrades and classmates are completely aware of my displeasure of hearing "bless you" or anything else after I sneeze or when someone else sneezes. Yet, some of them continue to remain ignorant over my polite request for no response to any of my sneezes (I ignore the remarks when they're directed towards others). I would like for those within my company never to respond, but no matter how much polite prodding I undertake the result is always the same.
Elliott
www.youtube.com/MechanisticMoth
www.myspace.com/PseudoPsychicAccumulation
I don't think you can ever really stop people from saying it simply because it's an ingrained habit most of us were taught when we were young. It ends up being reactionary to a lot of people, even if it done in an annoying way.
-- quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
Nemo custodiet ipsos custodes. Debemus custodes credare.
Personally, I vote we say "Curse you," since sneezing is a highly effective way of spreading certain disease, and cursing the sneezer for it would not be unreasonable.
Seriously, though, I like the French version, which translates to "To your wishes." It's just a harmless little bit of well-wishing for a sick comrade.
T.k.
You actually say something different after each sneeze. I can't remember what you say after sneeze 2 and 3, but you say 'die!' after the fourth. I found that funny.
~C
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I grew up with my grandmother going "Jesús", "María", and "José" after I sneezed, starting over if I sneezed more than thrice... Y'know, to keep the Holy Family on my side against illnesses. She's my grandma, what can I do?
Me? I tend to say "Salud" or, "Sueño". Don't ask about the "dream", because I have no clue, myself. It's just something I picked up from family.
Sometimes I actually find myself in the position of expecting "bless you" after I sneeze, and being surprised if no one says anything. It's all kind of silly if you ask me...we all sneeze, it's something natural that our body does....so why do we need blessed for it?
-Amanda-
I really understand where you are coming from on this situation. You really got your facts together and presented this issue in a very modest way. I truthfully have to say that "Bless You" is not in my vocabulary due the controversy of the religious standards and beliefs behind it. I one found myself in a conversation with a really dedicated Christian friend and he said something like he thought it was funny that people say “Bless You” because he was already blessed by Christ’s love and people didn’t have to keep on reminding him. I do have to conclude that I think that the saying “Bless You” after sneezing (a bodily act) is somewhat of a force or religion and something that needs to be voided and put behind us.
Wow, you must have really been insulted to type up a giant blog like this on sneezing... I know that you think it's a bad thing when people say "Bless You" and so on, but personally, if someone wants to bless me, then I'm fairly ok with that. Unless they're blessing me under the influence of something evil, then what's wrong with a random little blessing?
Some people aren't religious, and they don't want to be blessed, especially by strangers. If you want to be blessed, thats fine but not all of us do.
Yeah, I understand where you're coming from. Most people aren't truly blessing you anyway, as the main post is saying, they're just saying it because it's just become a custom. I think it'd be a good idea to find an alternative to saying "Bless You." If the story she stated is true (about sneezing having to do with an evil spirit or disease), we now know that to just be a silly superstition and can move on now. However, until we come up with an alternative, I think I'll keep saying "Bless You."
I don't get the big deal, honestly. I've never thought of it as a religious implication. I just thought it polite to say 'bless you' after someone sneezed. Kinda like asking if someone is ok or if they want some water after a coughing fit.
~C
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Personally, it is that big of a deal. I was just making the point for the blogger.
I only don't like it when people make me do it, or say "God bless you".
A simple "bless you" doesn't bother me all that much.
In most of the Asian countries, people don't say a word after someone sneezes. The sneezer naturally wiping his or her nose is usually the end of the story. People would rather spend their time on biting their tasty burritos rather than saying anything to express their care, because they only have twenty-four hours a day (while most of them need more than that).
P.S. I know burrito is from the Mexican cuisine.
I don't really like the idea of everyone saying "bless you" after I sneeze either, but it's not really a big deal. I move on with my life. I mean, I know some people may not be Christian but I don't even think it's about religion. People usually say it just because they were taught that it was something nice to say to people.
But when people sneeze around me I just say "bless me" so i don't get sick.
I guess I'm not that nice.
I don't see why people need to make a big deal out of it. Sure, I see where you're coming from, but all it really is nowadays is being polite, and we should hang onto that shred of politeness in a society that is growing increasingly impolite, not discourage it.
And that's comin' at ya' from yer local redneck hippie.