love changes people

November 16th, 2004
False Life

You left your fingerprints at the door
You came inside, but you weren’t anymore
The history that is you was only yours to hold
But your identity has changed
It’s made you hard and cold.

The footsteps we made on the sand
Have sifted to form some other shoe
And the hand I once held in my hand
No longer feels like you
Touch is so hard and cold.

What’s made you change your mind
I never meant this to happen
What’s made your heart so blind
This was never meant to happen
I can tell in the quiver of your voice
You never know what happens
You’ve fin’lly made your choice
I never meant this to happen

Those words you spoke all the while (all the while)
Have been all erased
And lips don’t seem to smile ( don’t seem to smile)
Anymore in the same place
Now it’s so hard and cold

Telling you what you need to hear (you need to hear)
Is harder than it seems
But living in your lie, dear (your lie, dear)
Was not part of this dream
This cold hard reality

What’s made you change your mind
I never meant this to happen
What’s made your heart so blind
This was never meant to happen
I can tell in the quiver of your voice
You never know what happens
You’ve fin’lly made your choice
I never meant this to happen

These are lyrics to a song I wrote describing a relationship I was in. This guy and I had been together for five months, be it those were rocky five months, but it was the first real relationship either of us had been in before. Whoever said relationships change people was right. We pretended that we still wanted to be together just because we loved each other and we had been through so much together. but the reality was... we were not the same people that had originally fallen in love. We couldn't picture our lives without each other. But he realized before I did that we would inevitably fall apart. he took my heart still pumping in my chest, and left with it. The wound remained open for the longest time because it appeared as if he had just suddenly turned his back on me and our love for each other. I felt hollow. My life changed because of him, in so many drastic ways. I still wonder today what he is up to and how he is doing... because I feel like just because our relationship failed doesn't mean that we aren't good people in other ways, and wish we could spend time together and see those good qualities instead of disregarding each others existence.