Anger and Pain

I just witness the most curious thing, not thirty seconds ago. My sister had come into the living room where I was sitting to get something. There's a set of two stairs going up to our kitchen from the living room. Upon exiting the living room, my sister tripped on the stairs, hitting her shin pretty hard. My mom called out, asking her if she was okay, and at first she was like, "Yeah . . ."

And then it came. First she started grunting and sucking in air through her teeth, making a hissing sound. And then, she started screaming. Her face was contorted in a twisted, angry glare, and she started pounding the inflicted area, still screaming. My mom walks into the kitchen and observes this commotion, asking, "I thought you said you were okay?" to which my sister responds angrily, "No!"

And then it was over. I guess the pain in her shin subsided, she got up and walked away. As she walked away, my mom said quietly, "It's not that I didn't care you were hurt, but I didn't want to say anything when you were so angry." And it was scary, how angry my sister was! I've seen her get that angry with me, with my other sister, with m brother, and with my mom. On one occasion I saw her get that angry with herself. But never have I seen her get so angry at a part of her body.

So she was in pain. Just thinking back over past times when I've been injured, I can remember being angry because I was in pain. I watched an episode of Scrubs last night, when Kim and JD were having their baby, and Kim was sooo angry . . . I mean, obviously, it's just a TV show, but I don't think I need to make the case that we lash out in anger when we're hurt. Not just physically, but emotionally hurt too.

But what I don't understand about my sister is why she would let loose that anger bred by pain out on herself. My sister could have hit the door frame, the stairs, my mom . . . but she chose to hit the shin, the very thing that was hurting her. Huh.