How many of you have been in a romantic relationship in high school? Raise your hands. By romantic I don’t necessarily mean there were copious amounts of true romance involved. Maybe you just held hands a couple times. Maybe you were too embarrassed to look at each other…it still counts. Okay, hands down. How many of you are glad that you dated in high school? I see that some hands went down. Those of you who put your hands down may have had a bad experience. Perhaps your boyfriend or girlfriend was a jerk who didn’t care about you, or just a total nerd. I’m here to tell you that these relationships, as pointless and crappy as you may think they are now, have actually helped you in the big scheme of things. Dating in high school is a teaching experience, it is worthwhile, and it is fun. I suggest that after I finish my blog, each of you go roam the halls and classrooms of your school and find someone to take to the movies tonight.
There are several different types of relationships people find themselves in during high school. There are crushes, or relationships that only exist within one person’s mind. There are “puppy love” relationships (I hate using the phrase “puppy love” so from now on I will refer to them as “PL” relationships). There are also deeper relationships called going steady, long-term, and long-distance (whispered: don’t believe what anyone tells you, long-distance doesn’t work). So, what’s different about all these relationship types and what’s the same? Recently, I interviewed several members of this class in regards to their love lives. I diligently analyzed their words and came to the conclusion that each type of high school relationship is beneficial and helpful. Now I knew how they were the same, but in what different ways did each relationship help?
One young man I interviewed named Franklin (I have changed his name to protect his anonymity) has been through each of the above mentioned relationship types. Franklin learned that he would rather have, “dated less people for longer.” He also learned that while dating is time-consuming, it is still, “a good thing.” I’m sure when Franklin is in college, he will make better dating choices. I also had the pleasure to interview Franklin’s first high school girlfriend, Eugena, whose name has also been changed. Eugena hasn’t had as much experience as her ex, but she still learned a boatload. When Eugena and Franklin first began to date, they were under the influence of strong pangs of PL. As time went on, however, Eugena discovered that these feelings faded after about 3 weeks. The two freshmen were just friends, and they were not quite mature enough to be in a relationship. Yes, it failed, but Eugena now knows the difference between friendship and romantic…friendships. You know, when you don’t just like someone, you like-like them.
The next two students I interviewed were the polar opposite of each other in high school dating terms. Igor is dating someone currently and Agnes is not. Igor has been in a great relationship for nine months (which is the length of time it takes to make a baby) and he is very, “happy.” Here’s another good reason people should date in high school: if you happen to find yourself in a good relationship, fun times will inevitably ensue. There’s nothing like driving around M-town with your significant other, maybe venturing outside the town to go see a movie (don’t go to the theater in Marion, it’s scary and gross), going shopping together. It’s all just so CUTE!! Sill, missing out on all the cuteness doesn’t seem to bother Agnes. She’s a happy, independent woman. You may think she is a good example for someone to use that’s writing an anti-high-school-dating speech, but she most certainly is not! Agnes is happy and independent because she is no longer part of a relationship that didn’t work. She may not be independent much longer, though. When I asked her if she was dating currently she responded in this way: “No…wait, me and *Eugena…are you doing homosexual dating?” The interview awkwardly ended after that because Eugena seemed surprised.
Life is just one big dating pool. It only gets more awkward as the years progress, so we must all be forearmed! Get out there, start dating, and accumulate some lessons learned. That way, you’ll be able to avoid mistakes before they happen, all thanks to your high school dating experience. I want you to run through the halls of your high schools; I want you to scream at the top of your lungs: “find me a significant other!”
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Highschool dating is a total waste of time, energy and money. I preferred having male friends. I had more fun and less pressure.
Simply Free