College is often referred to as the best years in one’s life. It’s a time to be social, party, have fun… oh, and study. Once completed, young adults move into their next stage of life – their career. However, what happens to those who are not ready to take that next step and would rather continue to party without the educational aspect? What if that person found themselves on the brink of an addiction? What if that person is someone close to you?
I recently found myself in this very situation. A person very close to me has developed a problem with alcohol. Worst yet, this person, who we will refer to as Bob, refuses to believe that it is becoming a problem. Bob believes that as long he is able to show up for work and maintain his everyday responsibilities that alcohol is not affecting his life. To Bob, three cases of beer in a weekend is considered a good time, not something one should be concerned about. This is not even taking into account the amount of beer Bob drinks throughout the week.
Being a person who cares deeply for Bob, I have tried an informal intervention. I have mentioned that I believe that he may have a problem and I have reviewed a few web sites with him showing all of the signs and symptoms that he has in common with an alcohol dependent person. Despite the fact that he fit some of the criteria like having a high tolerance, drinking 7 days a week, and constantly making excuses why he should be drinking, he did not fit some of the other symptoms. These other symptoms included, but were not limited to having withdraw symptoms when he was not drinking, having mood changes, and neglecting his everyday responsibilities. Because of this, Bob refuses to believe that he has a problem. I feel as if I am stuck at a fork in the road. Do I continue to stick my nose into Bob’s business given that he hasn’t exactly crossed the threshold of being considered a full-blown alcoholic, or do I let him live his life? What do you think?
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
I think that you should keep at him. Granted he may not have a full blown problem yet, but that time may come. You don't want him to continue on this path and then have something that is threatening to his life happen to him. You will have a hard time living with yourself and you don't need that burden. Although he may think your just bugging him, I think you should keep at it. I am a senior in high school and I have a friend who started hanging around with the wrong crowd and started getting into habits that were bad for her. I kept at her again and again and I don't know what it was exactly, but she finally listened to me at one point. I can see the change in her, and I know that she is back to being the old friend I started hanging out with long ago. You really can make a difference for him. Of course we don't know how serious his problem is, but you never will know. Don't stop being concerned. I wish you luck!
Three cases of beer is insane. Personally I use marijuana on a regular basis but feel that's okay because it's not physically addictive and doesn't cause significant harm to my body (some harm, yes, but I feel that in my case the benefits far outweigh the minor and reversible harm). Alcohol though... three cases of beer, I'm surprised he's not blacking out (is he?) and... well, his liver's probably failing already. It's so addictive, too. I drink quite rarely, the last time I drank was during winter break, when I went to an expensive restraunt with my grandparents and was served two glasses of wine despite being a minor. I got drunk off that - that's how high my tolerance is, because I'm small and drink so little.
I'm assuming Bob is an adult, in which case there's nothing you can do (unless he's under 21 and you live in a place where the drinking age is 21, in which case you could report him... which would probably do far more harm than good) except talk to him. Try and convince him to see a doctor to at least get his liver (and his kidneys, too, I believe alcohol harms the kidneys as well) checked out to make sure he isn't about to drop dead - it's a simple test and it won't do him any harm, there's no reason not to. Talk to him about the risks of alcohol. Try printing out papers on the harms of alcohol, and papers about alcoholism and how to drink less, etc. Don't act angry at him, don't try and force him to stop, just show that you're extremely concerned about him.