"You have to take the good with the bad, smile when you're sad, love what you've got and remember what you had...Always forgive, but never forget, learn from your mistakes but NEVER REGRET, people change, things go wrong, just remember life goes on"
So...this really isn't a major issue with teenagers, but I believe that too many of us are living in the past because we so called "regret" the things that we have done...if you continually "regret" things then you cannot live by the quote that I just put up there, because you can never move forward, only stay stuck in the past. I don't believe that you should regret anything because it is just an excuse to not take responsibility for your own actions or learn from them. Anyways, I just think that it is really dumb to sit there saying "oh I regret this" or "I regret dating so and so" because at one point it was exactly what you wanted and you did do it so why don't you just move on with your life and stop complaining about something that is no longer in your control.
So...just let me know your guys' opinions on this topic because I think that it is a really interesting topic.
I regret very few events in my life. I basically regret having consensual sex/sexual activities with three people. I wish my only consensual experiences had been with my ex-boyfriend. That is the only thing I regret. I don't even regret decisions which led to my being mistreated and abused, because that shaped my life and helped me become who I am now. Those encounters however have served me no positive thing in my life, they're just silly encounters I regret. It's not something I dwell upon often though, I generally just don't think about it - why dwell on something I cannot change?
Ranting is awesome, and blogging is an excellent way to get rants out (so is talking with friends, I've been up all night long talking with a friend of mine about child abuse in the USA and Japan). Perhaps make your titles a bit more about your posts though to avoid confusion? :p
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Please see my recent blog post, "Genocide and Student Activism": http://www.progressiveu.org/041447-genocide-and-student-activism
"You should never regret anything, because at one time, it was exactly what you wanted."
Ooh that's good. Where'd the quote come from?
I got the quote from an icon on photobucket....my name on photobucket is....dracoluver27...if you can get to my page it's on the first one...
Not necessarily. There are many things in my life that I could regret but don't (see above) that were NOT things I wanted at the time, but rather things that were done to me. Sometimes those things could've been avoided by different actions... but at the time I was taking foolish risks, not because I wanted to and not because I wanted to be hurt, but because I felt I didn't deserve better, etc.
In most cases though your quote applies very well and quite truely. Though... people can regret things they once wanted in a moment of foolishness.
If it was something that was done to you, then that is something that you obviously can't control, even if when it was in the end your choice to go down the path that led to this event. You still don't need to regret it, only grow stronger from your mistakes.
Regret is interesting...you make a point that at one time it is exactly what we wanted and also that regret holds us back from taking responsibility for our actions. I think in order TO take responsibility for our actions we must initially have some regret, or else there would really be no reason to take responsibility (you would only be justifying your decision if you never regretted it). But once responsibility is taken, we shouldn't live in the past, or continue regretting something that happened. That's something I do way too much when I know that I am trying my best to learn from my experiences and grow. I'm too hard on myself. That isn't healthy either.
And yes, at one point we wanted whatever decision we made but hopefully we have learned and changed since then, and know better what we want or what is good for us.
Good blog. Good points. Good topic. I'll rate ya.
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Even things that I have felt regret for, I have realized that they made me who I am, and I'm rather fond of who I am. Even family issues that I've wished were different I'm in some way grateful for because they affected decisions that I'm glad of. I really agree that regret is useless. The best you can do is learn from your mistakes.
Like what you've read? Well, then here's more:
http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/tricia0711