I was recently invited to my best friend's niece's birthday party. She's turning 7, and I had no clue what to get her. Last time I saw her, she was into Dora the Explorer (which is a bilingual girl who has a talking backpack, map, and a monkey that wears boots for a friend, which airs on Nick Jr...need I explain more?). Her mom told me she really started getting into Barbie dolls. Ah yes, barbie dolls.
I remember when I was a child and had my barbies. My friends would bring over theirs and we would play whatever we could think of. I remember thinking how perfect barbie was, with her huge smile and white teeth, perfect hair, perfect little nose, her tiny little waist, and those huge boobs. Man, Ken was one lucky guy. And you could make her do anything. My barbies were constantly being decapitated. We'd tie their hair to the ceiling fan, turn it on full blast and watch as their bodies were catapulted, headless, across the room. It's amazing that we escaped uninjured with the exception of a bruise here and there. To this day I wonder how no one lost an eye.
Of course, that was way more innocent than what was going on most the time. I remember being extremely fascinated with all that you could make barbie do. You could have Malibu barbie cruising around in her hot pink barbie Porshe in some heels and a bra and panties if you wanted. We had witch doctor barbie, too (self made, not sold in stores), which would tell the other barbies future. That was until she made a horrible mistake and the barbies got together and burned her at the stake with a magnifying glass(more interesting than burning ants!). Barbie also liked being tied to the dog and going for wild rides before she was thrown off. Barbie could do her grocery shopping completely naked (although we always put some heels on her, because it was easier to make her walk). Or the things we had Ken and barbie doing....if our parents had known any of what was going on with those dolls, we would have gotten spanked and had the dolls taken for good, I'm sure.
Which makes me wonder... Were my friends and I the only ones who were like this? And if not, how did the ideas get there? I honestly don't remember how my friends and I got started on turning barbie into this huge slut, because we were all raised in Christian households where sex was bad and hadn't gotten to the birds and the bees talk. None of us started having sex at a young age or even thought of it outside of incidents like those. Either way, it really makes me rethink that as a gift.
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Everybody KNOWS about sex, way, WAY deep down in there.
its like instinct or whatever! Thats why kids who were stranded on a dessert island with no outside influence would know how to do it, or at least the basics of figuring it out, when the time came!
Need I point out the Blue Lagoon?
I, too, tortured my Barbies. We had Salem Witch Trials, in which she was tied to a noose-thingy and set on a tree branch. We threw the rotten windfall apples at her until we got bored. Obviously, if she was hit by an apple, she fell because God wished her do.
...What a strange child I was...
Yes, Barbie and Ken had "relations" in my play-verse, too. Incidentally, Barbie and Skipper had something going on, too, as did Ken and the other guy. One time, we had the Barbie Soap Opera. Ken cheated on Barbie, so she ran him over with the Barbie-mobile.
And, yes, sex is pretty much a natural instinct. I had only the vaguest notion of how it worked, but it seemed that I got it right.
I had Barbie having relations with other Barbies...it was pretty much a free love thing going on there. For some reason we thought that being with as many people as possible was way cool.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who got oddly sick pleasure out of torturing inanimate Barbie dolls...maybe that's normal. Idk. I do know that although that's what I was doing, that doesn't mean I'd actually do any torturing in real life. Except my sister... but she's family. That's fair game.