The other day I was really angry at my mom for various reasons; mainly, because I had to drive her around for what seemed like the longest errand of my life. My mom tried talking to me in the car about something she assumed I was doing and ended up getting me really frustrated and start screaming at her. I was yelling at her and she was yelling back, really loudly if I might add.
Later on that day, I was driving to dance class. There was a little bit of traffic and suddenly this guy who was stuck at the end of it started yelling out the window. "COME ON! MOVE IT! WHAT THE F***!!!!" I, who was on the other side of the road watching, made eye contact with him. He looked at me a little ashamed of what he did, composed himself, and two seconds later, when the traffic cleared, he drove off.
I realized at that moment how stupid I must have looked to all the other people on the road while I was yelling at my mom. This guy had looked like an idiot and there was absolutely no reason to start cursing right away; just like I shouldn't have started screaming at my mom. I thought I had learned my lesson.
I came home yesterday and started discussing with my dad about a summer trip that I no longer want to go on. He told me I was going to go and I insisted I wasn't. It ended up to be the same thing that happened with me and my mom; one big screaming match. It was terrible. What usually happens is that he says something hurtful to me and I say something stupid to scare him.
Again, I sounded like an idiot. We live in a two family house. I'm sure that the man upstairs heard everything we said.
I need to learn to keep calm; even if the situation is really frustrating.
Stop SCREAMING!!!
By pkubik08 - Posted on June 2nd, 2008
Tagged: anger
• anger management
• attitude
• calm
• getting your way
• peace
• Broad prosperity
• Shared responsibility
• Better future
What you're going through right now sounds just like my senior year of high school. Toward the end of it, when all the college decisions had been made, my mom and I screamed at each other all the time. I mean ALL the time. I realized after I got out of the house that it was an important part of separating myself from her and developing my autonomy. I wish I could have done it without yelling, but the yelling was symbolic. I was a good kid, and I had NEVER yelled at or really even talked back to my mom. Yelling at her sent a huge, unmistakable message: I'm not a kid anymore. I wasn't conscious of any of this at the time; I just thought she was being unreasonable all the time. We've talked about it now, and she admits she WAS being more unreasonable than usual, because she was scared of letting me go. She wasn't conscious of that at the time, either.
Just don't say anything you'll regret later, and you and your parents will probably look back on this period and laugh. I know it feels really awful right now, though. I'm sorry you have to go through it.
http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/ediblewoman