The Next Time You Want to Say...

The next time you want to say, "I hate my mom," or "Gosh, my mom is so mean," don't.  Because you have a mother to be mad at. Seven years ago today, my mother died. She died of a broken heart. Literally. My brother had died 2 months before she did. He was unjustly murdered by the police and it hit her hard. I was ten years old when all this happened, and absolutely devastated. Now, I'm 17, and even more so. Because I am a senior in high school and I'm graduating this year and I'm going to college in the fall, and my own mother can't see that. It hurts so bad to know that my children will never know one of their grandmothers, that I won't have my mother to look over me and help me on my wedding day, to know that every mother's day, I don't have a mother to say thanks to. The last time I saw her, I was 8. It gets harder and harder every year to remember her face, her voice, the way she smelled, how she felt when she gave me a hug.

My dad has since remarried to an awful woman.

My mom, although she was not perfect, did not deserve to die. It wasn't her time-she still had children! She was and still is needed! And she was ripped away from us. From me, from my half-sister, from my entire family. And when she died, everyone in my family went into themselves and hasn't come back out. No one thought, "Oh, Dottie needs us. Her mother just died. She needs her family right now." No, they all only thought of themselves and never once did they think that her 10 yr old daughter would need guidance or help. Nope. I know this sounds really selfish, but they were selfish. They care only about themselves. The only person I have left is my dad. And we're not exactly the best of friends. Although I do have to say, we've been getting along a lot better.

But enough of my rambling. I'll just say this:  The next time you get mad at your mother, or say hateful things to her or anyone else, remember that life really is too damn short to be miserable.

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