Women and men view sex very differently. This is obviously rather cultural and driven by popular portrayals, but it boils down to something very simple. Men and boys will do almost anything, stereotypically, to say that they have had sex with a desirable woman. There virginity is something to be lost quickly, whereas girls and women will hem and haw to preserve their virgininity and be able to say they didn't have sex.
A man may consider sex to have happened if shirts and bra came off, or at least be justified in telling his buddies sex happened. A woman will probably not consider sex as having happened until vaginal penetration happens. My absolute favorite example of this is good little Christian girls who have anal sex to preserve their physical virginity. Running a close second is the new trend in high schools whereby a girl will give a blow job, but not have sex, often with many guys, so that she can still "put out" but can also claim being a virgin. She keeps the boys happy, doesn't have to worry about pregnancy and can still look daddy in the face and say, "I have never had sex, Daddy, I promise."
Guys are eager to round the sexual bases, if a bit apprehensive, but most girls seem pretty reluctant, at least in the beginning. Not the least reason for this is certainly teenage boys absolute lack of knowledge when it comes to female errogenous zones. A guy's crowning dream would be to have sex with a virgin, and girls, I suppose, like to keep that very special chip preserved as long as possible.
Perhaps sex is like a poker game, in the beginning, when we know nothing about it. We want to do it and see what it is, but just hopping into bed with someone is rarely a good idea. Both parties are a little curious, but neither wants to look like a sex crazed jerk or a slut, so they play a little poker. A dance of chance, people reading and bluffing that will end in hurt feelings or an awkward, and short, first sexual experience. From then on, assuming they stay within a group of similar experience, things get easier and better.
Problems arise though when more experienced players enter the game. This is especially a problem for girls. Frankly young women seem to be entirely too succeptible to older, more experienced guys and the, "I love you," line. They end up with broken hearts and a good deal of confusion about sex and what it is supposed to be.
Hmm, this got a little sprawled out. The cool kids seem to be writing blogs in series, maybe I will write a how to guide for young sex.
