One day I hope to write steamy romance novels whilst it being known I have never actually had sex. That would be hot. This will of course be under a pseudonym and get me through graduate school. I'm so glad I'll find the time to write them. Luckily I don't need much, since I'm a text-spewing machine. Now only if I could get to bed on time.
But really, what is the emphasis on sex, specifically heterosexuality, resulting in concerning the way we form communities and the way Christians relate to God who, according to many is male. Daddy God vs. Mommy God vs. Androgynous God.
One of my wrestling students mentioned that he felt anxious when realizing he would have to wrestle a woman in his weight ranking. Why? Perhaps our emphasis on sex and sexuality has created a border between the sexes, one that distances us at the same time it seemingly ties us together. It's more than what Rob Reiner so eloquently asked via his 1989 classic When Harry Met Sally ("Can men and women really be friends?"). It has to do with our religion and our relationships.
First of all the idea that links sex with sin has created an asexual God (confusing as somehow Mary was impregnated and God had a "son"), the closet/nervous loud confessions of fetishes, and a perpetuation of patriarchy (since women are invariably the sexual seductresses - burn us all).
My guess is that if we could possibly start thinking of sexuality as divine, it would seem a lot less dirty, and women would have a chance at being thought of as human.
Of course then I don't think I'd sell as many Harlequins.
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Society has conformed sex and sexuality to be all about lust it seems. The media feels as if they must include half naked girls in their shows just to get people to watch them. I personally think it's out of control. But changing this notion of sexuality from one of lust to something divine would mean that everything would have to change, because people have become so accustomed to seeing it portrayed the way it is.
Yes, it would have to be untwisted. I've always thought (and I may have gotten this from C.S. Lewis) that sin (or whatever you want to call it) originates from good in a parasitic way in that it is goodness twisted or damgaged. I.e. Love/sexual etc. love is beneficial to all involved in the right context, but twisted it becomes lust. Jealousy shows us we care, but twisted it becomes riddled with envy, control, or possessiveness. It would take a major overhaul of society to reorient our thinking.
In my limited expirence, it is very hard for me to be friends with guys. Between my sexist attitude, i'm not really sexist but guys percieve me that way, and the fact that half the guys I am friends with I really just want to be their girlfriend. That is why I have few guy friends because the ones that I did like I have asked out and we are no longer friends. It's not a very good idea AT ALL to ask a guy out! Let them come to you!
Sure, me too. And I think that many of us have neglected an emphasis of same-sex friendships, and so perhaps we've become unaccostomed to being truly platonic.
This is something I've been reading about quite frequently, actually. One theorist that comes to mind is Luce Irigaray, who discussed the matter of sexual difference in the woman being treated as the object, or the "other," or rather the "other-of-same" as man. Men "othering" women is almost dangerous, because in creating those boundaries you're mentioning, we're allowing for more objectification. In fact, I just heard on NPR this morning that Delta Airlines new way of getting more passengers to watch their safety video is to use "Delta Lena," a high-cheek-boned red-head woman who is flirtacious with the safety guidelines. What are we doing to sex and sexuality?? I agree with your idea branching toward the divine, and if I'm correct, I think that was also one of Irigaray's own comments on sexuality.
"So vast is art, so narrow human wit" - Alexander Pope
I think I have some Irigaray on the shelves I haven't quite gotten to. I'll need to open up the book and take a look at that. Thanks for the suggestion.
Sure you could sell trashy romances. Write about divine sex or something like that. Spiritual erotica. Sex as a form of worship or magic. Etc, etc.
Ooh, spiritual erotica. A subgenre I have not thought about. I love it. Basically what a lot of the mystics wrote, except non-fictionish.