Virginity: Is it safe?

I believe, like with most things, that losing one's virginity is a very personal matter that every person must deal with as they see fit.

I agree with you on the point that repressing sexual feelings can hurt a relationship, because just like with a lie, you both know something's going on, yet you don't want to admit it. I think the reason this links in so much to a relationship is because it is directly related to the fundamental component of ANY relationship, romantic or not--COMMUNICATION!

I think if you want to remain a virgin for a certain amount of time, or until marriage, or if you believe that having sex before marriage is OK, it is so important for people to communicate that to their significant other. Otherwise, body language can imply something that's totally unintentional, expectations will not correspond and one person might feel pressured by the other, there are just so many things that could easily be avoided by simply voicing your position.

It's also important because, although many people think sex should be spur-of-the-moment, people need time to go get condoms. A woman needs time to talk to her doctor about contraceptive measures such as birth control pills and/or the morning after pill. Either way guys, did you know that it takes an entire month from the time a woman starts taking birth control pills before those contraceptive measures will be affective?

If you don't want to lose your virginity, there are also things you can do that DON'T involve intercourse, yet you can still take care of any sexual frustrations and emotions (and NO, I'm not only talking about oral!!).

Again, so much can be solved simply by talking with your partner. That's the FIRST way you can try to be safe. Trust me, it helps so much!

I don't think modern times label people as being a whore or slut just because the are virgins. The fact is, most people are not virgins by the time they marry. It's a matter of how you go about being sexual. If you are in a long term relationship, monogomous, and you love one another, then the chemistry combined with the emotional part, really isn't anyone else's concern. It's between those two people. If things don't work out and you move on and have a later relationship, I don't think your new partner is going to think you are a slut, unless you have portrayed that.
Additionally, being safe is the bottom line. Choosing to have pre-marital sex is an individual choice. Communicating with your partner is the best way to handle things. Let them know that you are not into pre-marital sex, or even that you want to wait a while, if they care for you, they will understand. If they don't understand, then they really don't care about your inner being and aren't worth your time.
Be true to yourself.

women being labeled a whore or slut for expressing their sexuality is an example of the continution of the patriarchy. however that does not mean it is always in a girls best interest to become sexually active. Often young girls use sexuality to get a boyfriend (another example of patricarchy), or to obtain a sense of personal power.

Well. i do not agree. i mean you should not be forced to sleep with someone to "make it work" If you really love someone, than they will wait for you and marry you,this shows commitment. If you just want to sleep with someone, than are they there for you or to use you? I guess you can do what you want, just stay protected

Very well writen. The one that stay virgin I believe have higher morals than other people. But that is like a fraction of today's society. Yes there are protection out there but it is better to wait for marriage so you know it is what you want.

I think that people should try to have certain standards in there life. I have alot of friends who are not virgins and I don't look at them any differently.. so I don't tend to think that if you've lost your virginty, your automattically a slut. People slip up... alot. but just dont let the slip turn into oh i slip up 20 times. But I just think that waiting adds more value to the relationship. Knowing that you waited for that right person is awesome feeling.

Well,
He was not a virgin. He had oral sex. True it is not vaginal sex, but it is still sex, and he got a STD. People who say oral sex is not sex are fooling themselves. Sure, you can't make a baby, but it is still sex. A man who gets a blowjob, gives a blowjob, or engages in 69, engages in sex, because 1 or all partners climax.

I am a Virgin, I have never had oral, vaginal, or anal sex. I have never been raped. (Although, in the case of rape, I would consider the person to still be a virgin, because s/he had no choice.)
I choose only God and God alone, and I remain a virgin, until I die if I must.

S1701